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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24412354">The Doppelgänger(s) Diaries</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/RainbowVamp/pseuds/my-vampires-keeper'>my-vampires-keeper (RainbowVamp)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The DoppelGänger(s) Diaries [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Vampire Diaries (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Compulsion, Dubious Consent, Elena Gilbert Has a Twin, F/M, Gen, Madelyn is 17 so I'm counting it as underage, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Second Person, Reader-Insert, Recreational Drug Use, Trauma, but ability to consent is affected by compulsion, sex is not compelled, twin doppelgangers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 05:40:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>20,684</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24412354</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/RainbowVamp/pseuds/my-vampires-keeper</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Elena and Madelyn Gilbert were born on the same day, just eight minutes apart. They are identical in every way, except they aren't.<br/>When the Salvatore brothers come to town, drama starts. You get entangled with Damon Salvatore, and Elena and Stefan try and get you untangled. It goes about as poorly as you might expect it to.</p><p>Read the warnings.<br/>(Reader Insert. "You" are Madelyn Gilbert)</p><p>Updates every Sunday.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Damon Salvatore/Original Female Character(s), Damon Salvatore/You, Elena Gilbert &amp; Original Female Character</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The DoppelGänger(s) Diaries [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1762930</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>60</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Dear Diary,</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I'm basing this very loosely on the series, but I'm doing a lot of re-writing. I will skip mentioning, or only mention in passing basic parts of the plot that don't directly involve Madelyn. (Ex: Stelena) Unless they directly relate to something Madelyn is going through, or one of my side stories (I'm giving Bonnie a strong side story, but we won't get to it until like chapter 4).<br/>I'm writing this story in sections and posting those sections on my tumblr, (see end notes).<br/>I hope you enjoy this story as much as I am. ♥</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>Dear Diary,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Elena is getting ready for school on the other side of the room and judging me for still being in my pajamas. I’m writing this mostly to mock her. She’s going to school today. She thinks that school is a worthwhile place to be. I am not of that opinion. But hey, she can take the heat. So long as one twin shows up to school, no one will ever notice the other one isn’t there, especially since Elena is the good twin. I tried to tell her that if we go to school, we’ll just have to field a million questions about the summer and mom and dad, and we’ll have to pretend that everything is okay when it’s obviously not. Elena’s already started, so that’s nothing new to her. I can’t watch her pretend anymore. She’s been pretending to Jeremy and Jenna for weeks and now I feel like I’m supposed to start pretending too, or else I’ll be the sad twin. I’m kind of always the odd twin, but I refuse to be the sad twin. So if no one can see me, no one can see how sad I am in comparison to Elena the faker.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Your pen choose that specific moment to hit dry ink, and you flipped to the back page of your journal to angrily scribble in a desperate attempt to make it work. Before the ink could reconstitute, Elena’s voice was cutting through your thoughts.</p><p>“Maddie, I’m leaving in five minutes, with or without you.” Elena’s backpack looked like it was about to burst at the seams even as she continued to stuff books into it. “I’m serious. I’m not going to honk the horn. I’m not waiting.” The diary Elena had been writing in earlier was sitting on the nightstand, and you hand an unhealthy urge to look at what she’d written in it.</p><p>“I’m not going to school today.” You shrugged and wiggled deeper under the covers, journal still clutched in your hands. You hated sharing a room with Elena, but none of you really wanted Aunt Jenna sleeping in Mom and Dad’s old room, and after the first few nights of Jenna complaining about the couch, you guys had gone to the store and bought a shitty twin mattress and bed frame to shove into Elena’s room so that Jenna could take your room. Elena’s room was bigger, and had more closet space, but that didn’t make the move easy or tolerable.</p><p>“Jenna is going to be pissed.”</p><p>“Jenna isn’t going to notice.” You sing songed and then threw your broken pen across the room, letting it bounce off the wall on the opposite side and clatter to the floor. “I will be getting myself a breakfast of champions though. Maybe… toaster waffles and coffee. Good coffee, not the watered down stuff the rest of you drink.” You closed your journal and refocused on the pen you’d just thrown, wondering if you had another one nearby.</p><p>“Whatever, but I’m not covering for you.” Elena slung her backpack over her shoulder and you raised your eyebrow, giving the pen search up for lost and throwing your diary onto the floor between your beds.</p><p>“I didn’t ask you to cover for me little sister.” You said, flinging your covers away and stretching. “Doesn’t Aunt Jenna have a big presentation today? You should go make sure she gets to that.”</p><p>Elena looked at the clock on her nightstand. “She is definitely late,” Her hair whipped around her as she left, and it was strangely cinematic. A perfect shampoo commercial. Her straightened hair was sleek and smooth with no split ends in sight. The same had never been, and would never be, said about your hair. Unlike Elena, you wore your hair in it’s natural, messy waves, mostly because you couldn’t be bothered to do anything else with it. Those messy waves were tickling your back and annoying you, so you scraped them up into a bun at the top of her head, as you headed for the bathroom. Once the house was empty you’d make yourself breakfast.</p>
<hr/><p>You cranked up the music as Bonnie pulled out of the driveway with Jeremy and Elena in tow, Jenna long gone for her presentation.</p><p>First day of school, no thanks. You were taking an extra day for yourself. You’d start tomorrow. Maybe.</p><p>When you opened the freezer you were fresh out of toaster waffles. You groaned and threw your head back, slamming the freezer and then going in search of the ingredients to the closest alternative, pancakes.</p><p>You pulled out the boxed pancake mix that your father would have scoffed at, and the cheap maple flavored sugar syrup that would’ve made your mom cry but reminded you of school breakfasts and throwing packaged mini-pancakes at Vicki. A smile tugged at your mouth and you failed to suppress it. Instead you redirected your energy, looking for the mixing bowls. Of course they were on the top shelf, and you sighed when you couldn’t quite reach them, even on your tippy toes.</p><p>The collapsible footstool that you’d bought on impulse a month ago was sitting in the corner and you glared at it. You hadn’t needed a foot stool three months ago. You could’ve called Dad to get it for you. The angry tears stung your eyes, but you bit your lip and pushed them back, kicking the foot stool with more force than necessary in the direction of the cabinet you needed.</p><p>The sound of the stool hitting the lower cabinets was satisfying, so you kicked it again, and again, and again, until you were having a whirling angry tantrum, months after your parents died, over your parents death. When the stool hit the floor and folded over on itself you stopped kicking, staring at the green plastic atrocity. Your foot ached where you’d made contact with it, and your breathing was ragged as you stared at it. It wasn’t the footstools fault, but who else could you blame?</p><p>You swiped angrily at your tears and tore your hair out of the ponytail holder. It had fallen out during your angry outburst and it was irritating your neck again. When you pulled it back to replace the bun, you could’ve sworn you caught something dark out of the corner of your eye in the usually-bright window overlooking the backyard.</p><p>You squinted, your hands frozen in your hair as you searched for something that might have moved outside. Maybe a dog or a fallen tree limb. You checked the kitchen door and the other windows, but there was nothing running by, nothing fallen in the grass. You pursed your lips, but gave it up for lost, replacing the bun in your hair.</p><p>You were still in your pajamas and pancakeless when the doorbell rang. You groaned and considered not answering it, but then the guy knocked.</p><p>You knew it was a guy because he accompanied his very insistent knock with an explanation. “Hi, is anyone home? I’m new in town and I just moved in down the street. I’m having some trouble with my power.” Your mind warred with whether or not it was a good idea to answer the door. On one hand, you were alone and there was a strange man at your door. On the other hand, Elena knew you were home, and if this guy came back saying that he’d needed help and you hadn’t responded, you’d get an earful from her for months.</p><p>In the end you abandoned your pancake mix and your evil footstool so you could answer the door for a strange man with no power.</p><p>Your bare feet padded down the hardwood floor and you spared a thought for putting on a pair of shoes, but decided against it. This guy had come by early in the morning, unexpected, and you were still in your pajamas, so what could he expect?</p><p>You open the door and the man on the other side is completely, devastatingly gorgeous. He smiled at you when he saw you. He’d been looking off into the distance like he was deciding which house he was going to try next, and you were suddenly very glad that you’d decided to answer the door.</p><p>He looked you up and down, taking in your pajamas, messy hair, and bare feet. “I’m sorry, I caught you too early.” There was a sincere tone of remorse in his tone, and it was nice not to be judged for your choices, so you decided to cut him some slack.</p><p>“No, it’s fine. I’m playing hookie today. What was wrong with your power?” You tried to ask naturally, but his blue eyes were stunning. You could cut glass with that jaw line.</p><p>You really really wanted to touch him.</p><p>“I’m having some trouble getting it on. I called the power company last night, and they’re supposed to call before they send someone over, but…” He held up a sleek black rectangle, which you recognized as the newest model smart phone. “Phone’s dead.”</p><p>“Oh, damn. Um, you can come in and charge it, if you want? I was just about to make breakfast.” You moved aside and he smiled, stepping over the threshold with a certain grandiosity that surprised you.</p><p>“I’m actually starving, if you wouldn’t mind sharing? I promise to return the favor.” He gave you this wicked smile and suddenly you could see why he wore a black leather jacket. Definitely a suave type. Possibly a womanizer. Hopefully, that meant he was good in bed.</p><p>“Um, sure. I’m not doing anything fancy though. Just pancakes from a box.”</p><p>“I love pancakes.”</p><p>“Alright, cool.” You gestured to the coat rack by the door, “You can leave your jacket there if you want.” He shrugged it off and you took a deeper than necessary breath at the sight of his exposed arms in a white tee shirt. Wow. New neighbor, yes please.</p><p>“Thanks again, for this.” He said, waving his phone at you again.</p><p>“Yeah, no problem. There’s a plug on the island you can use. Have a seat.” You picked up the fallen foot stool and tried to reassemble it, only to realize that in all your picking, you damaged one of the hinges and it wouldn’t unfold anymore. Your face burned with the shame of it, but you needed the help. “And actually, it looks like my height enhancer just broke. Do you think you could get the mixing bowl down for me?”</p><p>He smiled and set his phone down on the counter. “Sure thing. Which cabinet?”</p><p>“There,” you open a door and point to the very top shelf. “The metal one if you can. It’s better.”</p><p>“Of course.” He smiled at you again and his white teeth shouldn’t have been attractive, but they were. Everything about him was attractive. You licked your lips unconsciously, and only realized you were doing it when he smirked at you, eyes glittering with mischief. You turned away and huffed at yourself for being so affected by a man. You’d been plenty of attractive men before. Who cared if this guy was a shining example of hot-bad-boy energy. He was nobody.</p><p>You shook your head out and smiled at him as he reached the bowl without even having to stand on his toes. He put it in your hands, and the passing of an object had never been so sensual in your entire life. His fingers brushed yours and it was cliche, but it felt like lightening.</p><p>“Thanks.” Your face heated again and you take the bowl, turning back to the island to try and get out of his view. You put the bowl on the counter and took stock of what you had. You’d lost your train of thought between the footstool fiasco and the hot guy now standing at your island, charging his phone and waiting for you to cook him breakfast. He had to be well over 20. There was no way you’d a real shot with him, but damn it if you weren’t going to try.</p><p>But not right then. You could be patient.</p><p>“So, what are you playing hookie from?” The nameless man asked as he took a seat at your island, putting him right back in your line of sight. You turned away to get a whisk and a measuring cup before you answered.</p><p>“First day of school. I needed an extra day before I went back there.” You looked over your shoulder and smiled at him, and the look he was watching you with was so intense, you were fascinated. “Guess it’s a good thing I did, or you might still be knocking on doors.”</p><p>“I’m definitely grateful. Not that I don’t value education, I’m just selfish enough to be glad I met you.” His charming grin made his eyes shine and you turned away before you could look any more ridiculous in front of him, biting your lip again and trying to keep from smiling.</p><p>Okay, Maddie, you were making pancakes. Whisk, measuring cup, and…</p><p>“Pan.” You finally said aloud, laughing uncomfortably and placing your haul on the counter. You realized right after you said it that it made you look a little bit random and unstable so you tried to explain yourself. “I just… I need a pan.” You knelt near the stove to dig a skillet out of the cabinet, and in the reflection of the black glass you could’ve sworn you saw him staring at you. Well… that was a good sign.</p><p>“Can I do anything to help?” He asked, not getting up from his seat, but when you stood up he was adjusting himself back into the chair, like he’d been leaning forward, possibly trying to get a better view of you.</p><p>“Um, not really. It’s just pancakes. You can grab yourself some coffee if you want though, mugs are in the cabinet above the coffee pot.” The coffee is left over from the rest of the Gilberts, but you liked your coffee a lot stronger than they usually took it anyway.</p><p>“Thanks. While I’m eating your food and drinking your coffee, I guess I could tell you my name. I’m Damon.”</p><p>He pulled down a novelty mug your mom used to like from the cabinet and you smiled at the memory of a dark-skyed Saturday morning with her corny “Let the rain fall down” mug. “It’ll bring rain.” She’d say, but it never did.</p><p>You were still smiling softly and staring off into the distance when Damon sat back in, “I think this is the part where you tell me your name.”</p><p>His comment startled you and you blinked a couple times, pulling yourself out the memory. “I’m Madelyn. Maddie for short.”</p><p>“It’s nice to meet you, Maddie.” He smiled at you again, and you were just as caught off guard this time as you had been before. You turned your attention to making pancakes in an effort to distract yourself.</p><p>“So, what brings you to Mystic Falls?” You asked as you measured out pancakes mix. Your hands were shaking just enough that your aim was bad, but you went on like it was what you meant to do.</p><p>“I actually lived her when I was younger. Thought I’d come back and see what there is to see. What about you? Been here your whole life?” He had served himself coffee when your back was turn, and now he sat back at the island watching you with an intensity that was simultaneously infectious and uncomfortable.</p><p>“Yeah, our whole family has been. For generations.” You said with a sigh. “I’m leaving after graduation.”</p><p>“Where to?”</p><p>“I don’t know yet.” You shrugged. “I’ve got two years to figure it out. New York seems nice.”</p><p>“New York State, yes, New York City… maybe, but there’s a big possibilities they would eat your lunch.” He smirked at you and you rolled your eyes.</p><p>“I’m a big girl. I can take care of myself.”</p><p>“I’m sure you can, just advice from one transplant to another. As you can see, I came back.”</p><p>“Yeah… so was it family that brought you back? I know Mystic Falls has a lot of long time residents.”</p><p>“Kind of. My little brother wanted to move back, and I hadn’t seen him since I left home, so I thought I’d check up on him. Stefan Salvatore. You might know him?”</p><p>You shook your head, “No, can’t say I do. But I run in a pretty tight circle. We aren’t much for outsiders.”</p><p>“Yeah, you seem too cool to be friends with my brother anyway. He’s a bit of a buzzkill.”</p><p>You laughed, and measured out water for your pancakes. “Are you calling me a party girl?”</p><p>“You’re skipping school to make pancakes and talk to me. I’m calling you someone who knows how to have fun.” He smirked and you shook your head at him.</p><p>“I wouldn’t call pancakes fun, but sure.” You whisked the ingredients together and turned on the stove. “So where else have you lived besides Mystic Falls? I don’t get to hear about other people’s travels that often.”</p><p>“Bit of everywhere, really. Spent some time in Chicago, New Orleans, New York. I like the big cities. Lots of people, lots of flavors.”</p><p>You laughed and looked up at him. He was smiling that mischievous smile again, but there was something about it that was just a little bit dark. It made you uneasy.</p><p>You didn’t think you wanted to know what he meant by flavors, so you greased the pan for your pancakes and changed the subject. “And how is your brother. You said you hadn’t seen him in a while?”</p><p>“Oh, you know, same old same old. But, why don’t you tell me about you? I noticed some pictures in the hall. Are you a twin?”</p><p>“Yeah.” You didn’t really want to talk about Elena, or your family, with this stranger. “What about you? Any other siblings?”</p><p>“Not that I know of. But my Dad was a cad, so who knows. I’ve never met a twin, what’s it like? Do you have telepathy, or a special power…?”</p><p>You laughed, “No, no we don’t. I think maybe you watch too many movies.” The sound of the pancake sizzling as it hit the hot pan was satisfying, and also a good distraction from the overly personal line of questioning. It was one thing to ask about you, but asking about your family felt like… too much.</p><p>“I’m sorry, am I making you uncomfortable?”</p><p>“No, it’s fine.” You said, but then you cut yourself short. It really wasn’t fine, but you couldn’t just say that. Most people didn’t get weird about people asking about their family, and you’d just been asking about his.</p><p>“No, I get it. I’m a stranger, you don’t know me very well, far be it from me to pry. But I have been told that I’m very approachable.” He smiled again and you looked up at him, looking him straight in his bright blue eyes, and he had you. “You find me very approachable, don’t you?”</p><p>“Yes, I do think you’re approachable.” You said automatically, and a certain amount of tension eased.</p><p>“And you don’t feel nervous at all about telling me about you, or your family. You really feel like you can share with me, don’t you?” He smiled kindly, and you smiled back.</p><p>“Yeah, I do,” You said, with more confidence that you thought you’d have about it. “It’s so weird, but I really do.”</p><p>He blinked and broke eye contact. “Excellent. So, siblings?”</p><p>“Yeah, it’s me and Elena, first born twins, and Jeremy. He’s about two years younger than us. I honestly don’t know what Mom and Dad were thinking, hands full with twins, and then they decide to have another.” You shook your head and scoffed. “But, I guess it all worked out. I don’t think I’d be here if it were just me and Elena.”</p><p>“Why’s that?” He asked, and you scoffed again, this time with more malice.</p><p>“Elena is the good twin. If it were just the two of us against the judgement of the world, I’d go insane. Jeremy though… he gets it. He gets me. I’m closer to him than I am to my own twin sister.”</p><p>“Interesting. And what makes you say Elena is the perfect twin.”</p><p>“I didn’t say perfect, I said good. She’s the good twin. You know, model student, cheerleader, popular, well liked by all, hated by only those who envy her.” You roll your eyes and refocus your attention on the pancakes. “I’m not really the type.”</p><p>“Why not?” He asked, “You seem plenty social to me.”</p><p>“I’m good at one on one stuff,” you confirmed, “small groups, people I know. I just can’t really do the big groups, strangers, acquaintances. All the founder parties, and the big events, that’s Elena’s thing. She shines there, and I just… try not to be noticed.” You frowned, suddenly swept by a wave of loneliness. Elena knew that you didn’t like crowds, but she didn’t really understand. How could she? She was always the Belle of the Ball. “Same thing with sports events, school dances, whatever.”</p><p>“I see. But do you want to be at those things?”</p><p>“No.” You scoffed and removed the pancake from the pan. It was already burned before you flipped it, so if you left it much longer there’d be no moisture left in it. “The founders parties are all just a bunch of people who care about reliving the past. Football games are kind of stocked with idiots who will peak in high school. I’d rather be home, or with my friends, but because Elena’s there, it looks like avoidance.”</p><p>“You mentioned school dances? Hate those too?”</p><p>You thought about it. “I don’t know. I’ve never been to one.”</p><p>This seems to surprise him. He raises an eyebrow at you. “Not even one? Seems like a right of passage.”</p><p>“Nope. Elena tried to convince me to go to one last year, but I let Mom and Dad buy me the dress and then ditched to hang out with Vicki.”</p><p>“Vicki?”</p><p>“My best friend. We’ve been inseparable since we were kids. Matt, her brother, used to date Elena, before the crash.”</p><p>“Crash?”</p><p>“Car crash. It killed our parents. Elena survived.”</p><p>“You and little brother Jeremy weren’t in the car?”</p><p>“No, we were here. Mom and Dad went to pick Elena up from a party.”</p><p>He nodded and then looked you right in the eyes. Those bright blue eyes mesmerized you. “So, tell me, do you blame Elena for the crash?”</p><p>“No. Not really. After listening to Elena beat herself up about it all summer, I can’t. It’s not her fault that the car skid. Mom and dad used to pick me up from wayward excursions all the time. It could’ve happened on any car ride.” You blink and when he looks away you feel a little bit striped raw. You hadn’t told anyone about that before. Not even Elena, who could’ve used the comfort.</p><p>“Huh. You might be a genuinely good person. Strange. I was expecting a sort of Evil Twin thing, what with the dark clothes and the anti-socialness. You know you’re only mentioned in this shitty town news paper like twice, and Elena… she gets her name in the paper nearly every month.”</p><p>“What? How do you know that?”</p><p>“It doesn’t matter. Forget that I said that.”</p><p>You blink and you realize that you’ve stalled at making pancakes. You pour another one onto the hot pan.</p><p>“Don’t take this the wrong way, but how old are you? You seem sort of young to be orphaned and alone in this house.”</p><p>You ducked your head and pushed a strand out of your face. “I’m 17. Our Aunt Jenna came to live with us and took guardianship of us after Mom and Dad died.”</p><p>“She the owner of the house?”</p><p>“No, Mom and Dad left it to the three of us. We’re all kind of owners. Its a family house, so no mortgage to worry about. Jenna takes care of all the legal stuff.”</p><p>“Huh, interesting.”</p><p>“Yeah, but, tell me some more about you. How are you finding Mystic Falls?”</p><p>Damon gave this a moment’s consideration. “It’s different, but there are some surprisingly familiar things. Of course, the gossip is already going, which is annoying. The curse of a small town. Everybody knows everybody and is in everybody’s business. It’s one of the reasons I left.”</p><p>“What were the other reasons?” You asked, hearing the tiny bit of resent in that last sentence.</p><p>“I wasn’t wanted.” He said with a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.</p><p>You tilted your head and felt a wave of sympathy course through you. “I’m sorry. That must have been really hard to deal with.” You reached across the island without thinking and you touched his hand. It was soft and a little bit cool to the touch. You chalked it up to the heat of the pancakes you’d been cooking.</p><p>“Yeah. But I got over it. Met some people. Moved on. It does happen.”</p><p>“That’s good. I’m glad for you.” And maybe it meant you could move on too.</p><p>“Yeah. Say, answer honestly, do you happen to have a distant relative named Katherine?”</p><p>You raised an eyebrow at the sudden subject change, but answered to the best of your ability. “No, I don’t think so. The Gilberts keep pretty good family records.”</p><p>“Yeah, I figured as much. So no one’s ever remarked that you look a lot like some long dead great aunt, or grandmother, grandmother’s sister’s niece…?”</p><p>“No,” you said with a shake of your head. “Not that I can remember anyway. Why, did you know someone?”</p><p>“Yeah, a long time ago. You really are her spitting image. I was wondering if maybe there was a common ancestor.”</p><p>You shrugged. “There’s only so many ways people can look, I guess. There are bound to be repeats.”</p><p>“Sure, but what are the odds?” He asked, “And twins, of all things. It just seems incredibly unlikely.”</p><p>“Maybe we’re not as similar as you think.” You shrugged again, not really concerned about his strange line of questioning. “Sometimes our minds play tricks on us. I see Mom at the grocery store every so often, and she’s been dead for months.”</p><p>“That sounds like a problem for a psychic.” He smiled, and you laughed.</p><p>“That sounds like wishful thinking. Who was she?” You asked, and he tilted his head. You clarified, “Katherine. The woman with a possible common ancestor? Who was she to you?”</p><p>“She was… important.” Damon said after a slight pause, his gaze unfocused like he’d been trying to find the word. “But, it doesn’t really matter. You’re not going to remember this.”</p><p>“What?” You laughed, “Have some faith in me. I’m not just going to forget you.”</p><p>“Yes, you are.” He smiled and looked you in the eyes again. “You’re going to forget everything that I said. You’re going to forget that I was here, and you’re going to go back to making yourself breakfast.”</p><p>“Okay,” You said, and he smiled.</p><p>“Great. Have a nice day.”</p><p>“You too!” You called, but he was already gone, and then, suddenly, you don’t remember him anymore.</p><p>You flipped the pancake in the pan and you didn’t spare another thought for the man you couldn’t remember meeting.</p>
<hr/><p>When all was cooked and done, you had a stack of pancakes almost as tall as your hand. It was pretty satisfying, even if you weren’t planning on eating them all. They would keep, and then you could have pancakes for dinner too.</p><p>The coffee pot was empty, when you went to serve yourself a cup, even though you could have sworn that there was still coffee in it when you came downstairs. No matter, you were happy to make yourself another pot and wait for it while you ate your syrup drowned pancakes.</p><p>The news still hummed in the background and when you turned your attention to it you saw a gaunt faced reporter talking about some gruesome animal attack on a couple the night before. You reached for the remote to turn the TV off and were suprised by your mother’s novelty coffee mug. The pale blue ceramic and “Let the rain fall down” black lettering seemed contrary to the mourning atmosphere the house always took now. Who would take it down and use it? It was still mostly full of coffee too. You decided that whoever’s it was, you might as well prime yourself, and you drank half of it in one gulp.</p><p>It tasted bitter and watered down, and you regreted the decision immediately. You didn’t think anyone in the Gilbert house drank black coffee. They must have just forgotten to prepare it.</p><p>When the coffee pot finishes percolating you dump what remains of the piss-water in your mother’s favorite cup into the sink and pour yourself a new mug. You add plenty of sugar and your favorite hazelnut creamer, and take your first sip. The sugar and bitter coffee taste leaves you feeling soothed from an anxiety you didn’t realize you’d been holding on to. Your shoulders relaxed and you breathed a little easier.</p><p>You returned to the island to finish your coffee and pancakes. The sticky sweet pancake syrup hit you at the back of the throat like liquid comfort, and you were almost unfazed when your phone, still upstairs in yours and Elena’s room started to ring.</p><p>You listened to your standard ring tone for a few moments as it went to voice mail and after shoving one more bite into your mouth, you got up to go check who had called.</p><p>The stairs were cool under your still-bare feet, the hollow sound of them echoing with an emptiness that hadn’t existed when mom and dad were still alive. Now every sound feels hollower, louder in the quiet. Dad’s computer doesn’t run in the upstairs office anymore, the noisy tower and boxy monitor remnants from almost a decade ago, but  Dad had refused to convert.</p><p>The whole house always felt quiet now. You half hoped to hear your phone ring again, just to have some more noise. TVs were always running in the background now, or music blasting, some noise to drown out the emptiness of two missing people.</p><p>Your journal still sits on the floor, but your phone is tucked into the cavity of your nightstand. The light flashes with one new message, and you unplug it from the charger. You have a missed call from Jeremy, and a text message.</p><p>“Elena is jumping down my throat. Where are you?”</p><p>You text him back, “I’m skipping today. You could’ve done it too.”</p><p>Jeremy: “Elena dragged me. Come on, Vicki misses you.”</p><p>You: “If she missed me, she’d text me herself.”</p><p>Jeremy: “She did, like twenty times.”</p><p>You: “Oops.”</p><p>Jeremy: “Come on. Just come to school. Please.”</p><p>You: “Okay, fine, but I don’t know what you expect me to do about Elena.”</p><p>Jeremy: “Just be here. If you’re here she’ll focus less on me.”</p><p>You: “Way to spread the misery.”</p><p>Jeremy: “Love you big sister.”</p><p>You: “Back at you asshole.”</p><p>You throw your phone on the bed and go digging in the small chest of drawers where most of your clothes was kept. School was, unfortunately, in session.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Where Have You Been?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>You meet two familiar faces, and one unfamiliar face on your first day of school. None of these meetings go well.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I've changed the nature of Vicki's relationship with Tyler to include a previous iteration. Basically they're on again off again. Jeremy/Vicki happened when they were off again, and you can read the rest.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <hr/><p>Jeremy, That's a Felony</p><hr/><p>You pull up to the school and you wish that you had just stayed home. Class was in transition and students milled around all over the place. Some people glanced your way, recognizing Elena’s car that was actually yours and Elena’s car, but they didn’t pay any real attention.</p><p>So when you got out of the car and you were immediately grappled by Jeremy, it caught you off guard.</p><p>“Dude, what-” You started to say, but Jeremy cut you off, grabbing the keys before you could put them in your backpack and shoving them back into your hand.</p><p>“Give me a ride. I want to get out of here before Elena corners me in another bathroom.” He looked over his shoulder, but there nobody looked your way, too caught up in their own lives. It was nice not having Elena around sometimes. If Elena was around people definitely would have looked.</p><p>“Are you serious? What bathroom?” You asked, straitening your backpack strap where it was falling off your shoulder. “Why’d she corner you.”</p><p>“She caught me putting in eye drops and she bitched at me about being high at school. Nobody even noticed.” He rolled his eyes and you sighed.</p><p>“First off, you know how I feel about that word” You stop his smart remark by holding up your hand, “second of all, why are you coming high on the first day of school? Teachers are on high alert for that shit. You stay sober the first week to establish a good rep, and then get high at school, when the teachers trust you.”</p><p>Jeremy rolled his eyes again, “I really don’t need my sister to lecture me about how to get high. I do fine by myself.” He started trying to bodily turn you around. “Now get back in the car and take me home.”</p><p>“So I can suffer here? I don’t think so. Come on.” You wrap your plaid clad arm around his shoulders and steer him back in the direction of the school. “If I have to be here, so do you.”</p><p>“Way to spread the misery.”</p><p>“Mhmm.” You smile and walk with him back towards the school. On your way there, a kid falls in step beside Jeremy and murmurs something that he thinks is very quite.</p><p>“You got any, Gilbert?”</p><p>“Not right now, man.” Jeremy glanced up at you and then glared at this kid, whoever he was. You glared at him as well.</p><p>“Yeah, not now. Can’t you see I’m trying to spend some quality time with my darling little brother?” You smile at the boy, but your eyes are deadly. You squeeze Jeremy’s shoulder a little tigther to you and he winces, but you know you haven’t hurt him. You haven’t squeezed hard enough for that, just enough to make a point.</p><p>“Yeah, okay.” The kid stumbled off and you turned your glare on Jeremy.</p><p>“Tell me you’re not.”</p><p>“What?” Jeremy asked, feigning innocence, and you glare.</p><p>“Tell me you’re not selling drugs on school property. That’s a felony, Jer.”</p><p>“Who cares? I’m not going to get caught.”</p><p>“I care when I have to bail your ass out of jail. Every idiot who ever got caught, got caught because they thought they wouldn’t.” You pulled stopped the both of you and looked around. Students were filing in, and the crowd was thinning. You didn’t have much time before a principal or security guard came around asking what you two were doing. “Keep that shit somewhere no one can see it. I’m serious Jer.” She pressed when he rolled his eyes at her.</p><p>“I gotta get to class,” He says, and ducks out from underneath her arm. She sighs and watches him go, then goes to the office to get her schedule.</p><hr/><p>Where The Hell Have You Been??</p><hr/><p>“Oh my, God, where the hell have you been?” Vicki asked as she accosted you before your last class of the day. “I’ve been looking for you all day. And you just disappeared all summer, what the hell? And don’t try and tell me that you went off somewhere, because Jeremy told me you were just sulking at home.”</p><p>“I wasn’t sulking.” You say as you walk to your history class. Thankfully it’s not with Mr. Tanner. You’d already heard other students complain about him today, and you weren’t in the mode to take embarrassment gracefully.</p><p>“You totally were, but it’s fine, I get it. I get pretty pissed when mom leaves. I know it’s not the same thing, but…” Vicki looks sad and rubs your shoulder. “I’m glad you’re here.”</p><p>“Me too,” your smile is sad, but your are glad to see your best friend again. You’ve missed her.</p><p>“So, I know you weren’t here this morning. We’re supposed to have the hell hole that is PE together. What changed your mind?”</p><p>“Jeremy, actually.” You told her as you continued down the hall. “Elena was jumping down his throat. He didn’t tell me she was jumping down his throat because he’s dealing.”</p><p>“Ohh, did you want to know that?”</p><p>You sigh and look over at your morally questionable best friend. “How long have you known?”</p><p>“A while. He’s been dealing to me.”</p><p>You sigh. “You know it’s a felony for him to deal on school grounds, right? I don’t care about the drugs, but Jeremy isn’t going to survive in prison. He’s too sweet.”</p><p>“You should give him more credit. He’s tougher than you give him credit for.”</p><p>“I know.” You sigh and she wrapped an arm around your waist. You did the same and the two of you walked like that for a while.</p><p>“You are okay?” Vicki asked, and you nodded.</p><p>“I mean, not really, but, I’m going to be. You know me, I’m strong.”</p><p>“Strongest girl I know.” She squeezed you and shared a sad secret smile with you. You nodded.</p><p>“So, anyway. Over the summer I met this guy, and I think he’d be perfect for you. I’ve been trying to set you guys up for weeks, but you’ve been ignoring my calls.”</p><p>“I’ve been ignoring everyone’s calls. I’m depressed as shit and I don’t want to have to pretend I’m not.”</p><p>“I get it.” Vicki said, “But I’m not asking you not to be depressed. I’m asking you to go on a blind date with this guy I think you’ll really like. Total sweetheart. Couldn’t hurt a fly. Asked me if my weed was organic.” She snorted. “You’ll love him. He’s got money written all over him.”</p><p>“Why didn’t you get with him then?” You asked, and she looked away. “Vick, no.” You whispered when you saw the guilty look on her face. “Vick, no!” you half-yelled when she still didn’t respond.</p><p>“You don’t get to judge me.” Vicki said pointedly. “You were gone all summer. Tyler wasn’t. And… He cares about me.”</p><p>“He’s using you, Vicki.”</p><p>“I care about him. If you were my friend, you’d be happy for me.”</p><p>“That’s not fair and you know it.”</p><p>“Why? Because you’re little miss wam, bam, thank you ma’am. Too good for long term relationships, I shouldn’t be in one?”</p><p>“That’s not what I said. Vicki.” You released her arm and stopped her, putting both your hands on her shoulders to make her look you in the eyes. “Vicki, I love you like my own sister, and I swear to god, Tyler is a wretched human being with more issues than you and I put together. He’s not good for you.”</p><p>She pulled out of your grip and walked away. “I’ll text you with the details for your date. And if you don’t show up, we’re not friend anymore.”</p><p>You watched her walk away and then closed your eyes and pointed your face to the sky, trying to convince yourself that didn’t just happen. How could everything have gone to shit while you were mourning?</p><p>Maybe Elena the faker had the right idea. Maybe it was time to put on an act and get the people she loved back on track.</p><p>“You okay?” Matt asked, and you turned to look at him.</p><p>“Did you know Vicki was dating Tyler again?”</p><p>“According to Tyler, they’re just hooking up. At least, that’s what he told me when I asked about it. Why you heard something different?” Matt looked so concerned with his all American boy charm, and you wished more than anything that more boys were just like Matt.</p><p>“No, that’s probably right. She just dropped the bomb on me after she told me she set me up on a blind date. I love your sister.” Your delivery is more than a little dry, and he gives you a sympathy shoulder pat.</p><p>“You can’t pick your best friends.” He said simply and you scoffed.</p><p>“Yes, you can, and I did, for hell or high water.”</p><p>Matt smiled and released your shoulder so you could both get to class.</p><p>That little bit of kindness and connection carried you through the rest of your history class. Sometimes you liked Matt more than his sister. Only sometimes, and only when she really pissed you off, but sometimes.</p><hr/><p>No, Actually, I'm Not Elena</p><hr/><p>The final bell had finally rung and signaled sweet release. Even though you’d only had a half day, it felt like it had dragged on forever. The streams of students leaving the building were pulling you along the hall until you could finally duck out to fill your locker.</p><p>You didn’t intend to take any of your textbooks home, ever, so you were shoving them in your locker for safe keeping. Aside from Jeremy illicit drug dealing and Vicki’s insistence that you go on a blind date tonight or end your friendship, everything was as you expected it to be. Elena had sought you out three times to confirm that you were there, attending class, and not high. You sighed and reassured her each time, but it was starting to get annoying. She was supposed to be your little sister by 8 minutes.</p><p>You are still shoving books into your locker when you hear it. The one word that would ruin the rest of your afternoon.</p><p>“Elena?” Someone asked from the other side of your locker, and you slammed it closed so you could look the idiot in the eyes. Anger bubbled up in your chest like acid, but you tried to keep most of your temper in check.</p><p>“Guess again.” Your eyes glanced up and down at the teenage boy who had mistaken you for your sister. Pretty eyes, big hair, pouty lips, and most importantly, brand new to Mystic Falls. You’d never seen his face, but you’d heard talk about him all day in the short lulls between first day speeches and introductory nonsense. New guys didn’t show up in Mystic Falls every day, and the school was buzzing about this one.</p><p>Instead of acknowledging that he was the talk of the school you stepped back and pointed to the next locker over. “Her locker is that one. You can wait for her here.” Your backpack still weighed heavily on your shoulders, but you could wait to finish putting away your books until tomorrow. Until that moment, you hadn’t actually been mistaken for Elena. People could usually tell you two apart now. But Stefan Salvatore just had to rain on your parade.</p><p>“Elena never mentioned that she had a twin,” Stefan said, following you out of the school to the parking lot. Great.</p><p>“I’m sure she’ll have the tragic family back story talk with you eventually. Don’t take it personally. You’ve only known her for a day.” You barely paid him a glance as you got to the entrance, but he stepped in front of you, putting his hand out to block your path.</p><p>“I just meant, I’m sorry for the mistake, and it’s nice to meet you.” His eyes looks so earnest, and you sneered.</p><p>“Yeah, I can’t say the same. See you never.” You walked around his arm and out the other door, leaving him in your dust and looking for someone Vicki so you could drive her home, or more likely to some address just short of wherever Tyler was going to be hanging out. Instead, you found Jeremy, waving to you from across the parking lot.</p><p>You meet him half way and he smiled. “Elena said you still have the keys to the car.”</p><p>“Yup. You need a ride?” You looked over your shoulder and thankfully, Stefan was nowhere to be seen, but you still wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible.</p><p>“Yeah. I’m just gonna hang out at the grill. Vicki ditched me.”</p><p>“Huh,” You said, pursing your lips. You didn’t realize Jeremy and Vicki were close. She’d only mentioned that she was buying from him. You pulled the keys out of your backpack and nodded your head in the opposite direction. “Come on, I’m heading there anyway. Vicki set me up.”</p><p>“Set you up to what?”</p><p>“Go on a blind date with a random stoner.” You looked over your shoulder again. Even with your vigilance, you couldn’t see the hazel-green eyes staring at you behind sunglasses, but a chill ran up your spine that didn’t match the warmth of the beating afternoon sun.</p><p>“Come on, we’re burning daylight.” You gripped the rough fabric of Jeremy’s jacket a little bit harder than you meant to as you steered him towards the passenger seat. Something just didn’t sit right while you were still out in the open.</p><p>You were almost a mile away for the school before you finally let yourself relax, assured that you weren’t being followed. It was your paranoia on overdrive and, you knew it, but, you just couldn’t shake the feeling that someone was watching.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Well, Hello (Again) Mr. Salvatore</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>School isn't as exciting as after school. You get set up on a blind date that doesn't go as you expected.</p><p>Warnings for: Mentions of drug use, passing mentions of sex, compulsion used without the victim knowing, vague slut shaming, mentions of real serial killers, and fade to black dubious consent sex (Between you and Damon).</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So I realized as I was writing that this story actually feels a lot more like a prequel to the real story that's to come. So... sorry if that's the way this comes off. Also, the consent here is marked as dubious because it's affected by compulsion. She isn't necessarily compelled to accept sex, but she is compelled to forgoe all of her natural warnings, and that's definately dubious consent, even if she wanted this before the compulsion.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <hr/><p>Shut Up About Your Sex Life</p>
<hr/><p>The smooth road beneath your tires lulled you into a sense of safety on your way into town. You decided now was a good opportunity to ask Jeremy about Vicki.</p><p>“So, are you and Vicki close?” You tried to sound as casual as possible, but you were only a marginally better liar than Elena, who hadnever been a very good liar.</p><p>Jeremy frowned and you pretended you didn’t notice it. “We got pretty close over the summer. She was really there for me when I needed her.”</p><p>You nodded, “That sounds like her.”</p><p>That doesn’t sound anything like her. Vicki, for all the love you have for her, is avoidant to her very core. It’s why the two of you get alone so well. You bonded over your tendency to avoid issues. She did drugs. You self-isolated. It was a terrible pattern for you both.</p><p>“Yeah. So I just don’t get why she ditched me today.”</p><p>“I don’t know, Jer. Maybe it’s my fault. I really pissed her off earlier.”</p><p>“What happened?” He asked, suddenly all ears and turned in his seat to watch you. You glanced in his direction and something about the desperate look in his eyes made you wary of continuing.</p><p>“She told me that she got back together with Tyler, and I kind of went off on her.”</p><p>“She what?” His innocent mouth hung open in shock and you knew that it had been a bad thing to bring up.</p><p>“Jeremy, don’t make me say it again. You know I hate Tyler Lockwood with a burning passion.”</p><p>“So do I.” He muttered darkly, sitting back in his seat.</p><p>You thought over your memory of Vicki’s work schedule and then glanced at Jeremy. “Are you sure you want to go to the grill? I can ditch my date and we can play video games for a couple hours.”</p><p>“No, I want to go.” He said and that determined face told you that even if you didn’t take him, he’d get there. Shit.</p><p>Shit, shit, shit. Why was everyone in your life making bad life choices right now?</p><p>“Okay. Vicki texted me the details, I’m not supposed to meet him until 5, so I’ve got time to kill. Want to grab a bite with me?”</p><p>“Why would you eat before a date?” Jeremy asked, and you raised an eyebrow at him.</p><p>“So that the date doesn’t last as long.”</p><p>“You are so weird. I know the guy she probably wants to set you up with. He’s alright.”</p><p>“Yeah, well, dates aren’t really my thing.”</p><p>“Like you haven’t gone back to plenty of guys places.” His utterance was low enough that you almost couldn’t hear it over the car engine and the road noise, but he wasn’t that discreet. Heat rose in your cheeks and your left eye twitched. You held the skin with three fingers and try to massage some of the jerkiness out of it.</p><p>“There’s a big difference between going home with a guy and going on a date. One of them is productive.”</p><p>“Oh, gross, I don’t want to hear that.”</p><p>“You started it.”</p><p>“And I’m ending it. I don’t want to hear about your sex life.”</p><p>“Then don’t comment on it!”</p><p>“Fine!”</p><p>The car descended into horrible, pressing silence and you wished that you hadn’t brought up Vicki. It was a feeling you got a lot because as much as you loved her, Vicki was complicated, maladjusted, and kind of selfish.</p><p>So were most people though, so you tried to give her leeway.</p><p>When you pulled into the parking lot behind the grill, Jeremy got out before you parked. He didn’t spare you so much as a wave goodbye as he stormed into the grill. Your clock said it was only 4:15, so you put your head back and turned on the music to detox from the emotional roller-coaster ride that had been your day.</p><p>Between Elena’s check in’s, Jeremy’s drama, Vicki’s drama, and the weird new kid calling you by Elena’s name, you were exhausted. You wanted to go home, have a nap, and then maybe spend some time in the garage with your punching bag and a set of weights. You didn’t want to put on a face and smile at a stranger.</p><p>So you weren’t going to. You’d considered being cordial for Vicki’s sake, but you had had a blind date sprung on you on a Monday night only four months after your parents died. It was a terrible, horrible, mess of a day, and it would probably only get worse. And as you ruminated on that lovely thought, time passed.</p><p>Eventually, someone tapped on your window and you broke you out of your misery. It was Vicky, tapping at her wrist, empty of a watch and looking exasperated. You rolled down the window so she could talk to you.</p><p>“Jeremy said you were out here. Your date is in like 10 minutes. Get cute or so help me.”</p><p>“Will do, Ms. Donovan.” You said with a tired smile, and she smiled back, much more wholeheartedly.</p><p>“Good. I really think you’re going to like him.”</p>
<hr/><p>Well, Hello (Again) Mr. Salvatore</p>
<hr/><p>Your version of getting cute consisted of pulling your hair out if it’s bun to let it fall in messy waves around your face, trying to hide the ponytail line by fluffing it up with your fingers, and then applying a little lip gloss. There was nothing you could do about the oversized plaid shirt and skinny jean combo you were donning, except to take off the plaid shirt and walk into the grill in a lacy take top and your sister’s leather jacket in the back seat. It was an obviously last minute look, but Vicki would be satisfied.</p><p>When you walked into the bar, several sets of eyes watched you that you could see. Since you wore your hair in waves, no one assumed you were Elena, despite wearing her jacket, which was nice. You smiled at Matt when you saw him and spared a glance for the back of Tyler’s head before you sought out Vicki.</p><p>“So, where’s my mystery date?” You ask her and she looks around the grill.</p><p>“Nowhere, yet. I’m not going to let you miss him, don’t worry. I saved you a table. She looked you up and down and then without any warning tugged the front of your tank top down to show more cleavage and your bra straps up to raise your boobs. You groaned and batted at her hands, but the effort was half hearted as she continued to fix your hair. “God, this is a mess, what did you do?” She ran her own fingers through the strands to give it what assistance she could.</p><p>“I tried.” You whined at her, and she smiled at you, eyes glittering with the love and trouble that made you want to keep her as your friend, despite her tendency towards self-destruction and temper tantrums.</p><p>“Good. I’ll send your usual to your table and make sure he comes straight to you when he gets here.”</p><p>“Why is this so important to you?” You asked her, and she smiled.</p><p>“Double dates.”</p><p>“No.” You told her, stern tone in your voice and a hard look in your eyes.</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>You sighed and rolled your eyes, more fond than exasperated at that point. “I put up with a lot from you.”</p><p>“Because you love me. Go sit and wait. Don’t pull your shirt up. Sit there and look like you’ve got better things to be doing.”</p><p>“I do.” You remind her, and she just shook her head.</p><p>“No, you really don’t. Go,” she pushed you in the general direction of one of the few empty tables. The Mystic Grill was only getting more and more full by the second. “I’m going to go take orders. See you in a bit.” She grinned and you sighed, but you couldn’t keep the fondness in your chest from coming out in your expression.</p><p>In then end, you humored her, like you always did.</p><p>You stirred the non-alcoholic drink with a little black straw. Vicki kept her promise and sent your usual, a cranberry and sprite mixed drink that looked enough like regular alcohol that no one ever asked. You just needed to occupy your hands.</p><p>You waited like that, taking only minute sips of your drink, for nearly half an hour. In that time you’d checked your phone a dozen times and stared at the empty seat across from you and day dreamed, but you never heard anything from the guy.</p><p>When Vicki came by with a tray full of empties she whispered, “I don’t know what’s taking him, but I swear, this isn’t like him. He’s the pull your chair out for you, show up fifteen minutes early with roses type. I’m trying to get ahold of him, but he’s not answering.”</p><p>“He’s ditching me.” You told her, and she shook her head.</p><p>“No, he’s not. He would’ve just said no. He wants to meet you. He thinks you’re hot.”</p><p>“You showed him my picture?”</p><p>“Duh.” She shook her head at you like it was a ridiculous idea that she might not have. “Look, here he is.” She pulled out her phone and clicked through it until she found a poorly focused shot of her, Jeremy, another guy, and a few random people in the background.</p><p>“That’s him, with the green eyes. Isn’t he cute.”</p><p>You couldn’t argue. “Not bad.”</p><p>“See? I told you. Just wait, he’ll be here.” She pointed to your drink that was mostly ice now. “Next one’s on me.”</p><p>“And you’re going to sneak it onto Tyler’s tab.”</p><p>“Yes, exactly.” She smiled at you and then at a customer who had been calling her for the better part of your conversation.</p><p>And you sat some more, day dreaming and wishing you were home, until someone slid into the booth across from you who looked nothing like the man in the picture Vicki had shown you.</p><p>“I’m not sure who left you here all alone, but they should be drawn a quartered.” His bright blue eyes sparkled and his smile was devastating when he directed it at you. His shock of black hair against pale skin actually worked well for him. That, combined with the worn leather jacket and the soft looking tee-shirt he was wearing cemented the deal, you wanted him.</p><p>“That might be a bit excessive for a missing blind date, but he did waste my time.” You smiled, glad you’d decided to make yourself look cute for your non-date. You were also glad Vicki had made you pull your shirt back down when she came over to give you your second drink. “I don’t think I’ve seen you around before. I definitely would have noticed.” You shoot him your best flirty smile, the one you save for special occasions, and he grinned right back at you.</p><p>“Yes, you would have. I’m Damon Salvatore, founding family member and estranged good for nothing, returned for a girl in a tomb. And you are…?”</p><p>“Madelyn Gilbert, but my friends call me Maddie. What was that about a girl in a tomb?” You asked, curiosity peaked.</p><p>“Oh, nothing, just an old inside joke. Since your date seems to be a bust, why don’t you take me home instead?”</p><p>“That’s a little forward, don’t you think?” You asked, but you were half considering it. You felt like you could trust him, somehow. Not as much as you would’ve trusted your family, or Vicki or Matt, but still. Something about him gave you pause.</p><p>“It was, but I think you like forward.” He leaned in and his bright blue eyes were captivating. You got lost in them, but suddenly found yourself agreeing.</p><p>“I do,” you agreed, and he grinned.</p><p>“So it’s settled. Let’s get out of here.”</p><p>“Maybe after you tell me your name, fast guy.” You smiled, because the pick up, while obvious, was kind of working. Most guys beat around the bush and paid false compliments well before they went in for the kill. He wasted no time asking for what he wanted, and you liked that.</p><p>“I’m Damon, Damon Salvatore, and you,” He leaned forward, his perfect eyes still trained on you, and traced his thumb over the barest edge of your lower lip, “are a very lucky woman.”</p><p>“Yes I am.” You agreed easily, and he flashed his stark white teeth at you.</p><p>“Lets get out of here.”</p><p>You nodded your head and let him take your hand, pulling you out of the booth. You didn’t so much as flinch when he wrapped his arm around your waist, though you didn’t really lean into it either.</p><p>Damon turned to look at you, and you got caught in that blue gaze again. “You should tell your friend you’re leaving, so she doesn’t worry.”</p><p>“I’ll text her.” You said, pulling out your phone on your way out the door.</p><p>With your head down and in your phone, you didn’t even notice when the two of your brushed by Elena and Stefan. Elena noticed, but just stood gaping at you, while Stefan’s face flicked through a plethora of emotion from shock, to fear, to rage.</p><p>Damon mouthed, “Hi, Brother,” as the two of them passed, but you didn’t catch it, still texting Vicki and telling her that you got tired of waiting for her guy and decided to take one of your own home.</p>
<hr/><p>But Is He A Psycho Killer??</p>
<hr/><p>As Elena approached the table Caroline pulled her down into a chair, not even letting her anger at Elena being close to Stefan take over her irritation at Madelyn. “I knew your sister was easy, but that guy picked her up in, like, less than two minutes. What the hell?” Bonnie, who was also at their table, said nothing.</p><p>“I’m not sure what to tell you, Care. She’s been like that since…” Elena trailed off. <span>Since mom and dad died</span> was implied, but saying it would bring the mood down. Instead Elena redirected. “It’s just her way of dealing with things.” She shrugged and threw her bag down, offering Stefan a seat next to her. He took it graciously, though not entirely gladly.</p><p>“Well it’s dangerous! I don’t even like her that much, but I don’t want her to end up the victim of a psycho killer.”</p><p>Stefan sat quietly in contemplative silence, watching the exchange and wondering how much he should divulge. The girls at the table continued to talk around him.</p><p>“You think that guy was a psycho killer?” Bonnie asked, dragging a fry through a pool of ketchup, not looking up at either of her friends.</p><p>“I mean, he could be. Have you guys ever seen him around before?”</p><p>“No,” Elena frowned. “I’ve never seen him before.”</p><p>“Never seen him,” Bonnie agreed, munching a fry.</p><p>“He’s actually my brother.” Stefan cut in knowing there was no better time to say so. “I haven’t seen him in years. I didn’t even know he was in town.”</p><p>“So confirm or deny,” Caroline pressed. “Is he a psycho killer? Should we call my mom?”</p><p>“Her Mom is the sherriff.” Bonnie filled the likely knowledge gap, just for the sake of saving time. She wasn’t really interested in whether or not Madelyn had gone home with a psycho killer. She had other things to worry about.</p><p>Elena, however, was concerned about Stefan’s brother for reasons that had little to do with her sister’s possible impending death. “I didn’t know you had a brother.”</p><p>“I didn’t know you had a twin sister. She was kind of upset when I called her by your name in the hall today.” Stefan laughed, but it wasn’t particularly funny then or in the present.</p><p>Elena made a face. “Yeah, she really hates that.”</p><p>“Okay, cool, Madelyn has more issues but seriously. I don’t want her to end up dead. Even Ted Bundy was somebody’s brother.”</p><p>“Did Ted Bundy have siblings?” Bonnie cut in, and Caroline glared.</p><p>“I don’t know. Probably.” She turned back to Stefan, “So, is she safe or not, Stefan?”</p><p>“As safe as she can be taking <span>him </span>home.” Stefan said, and he felt only some conviction when he said it. He was fairly certain that whatever designs he had on the Katherine-Look-Alike were non-murderous. He could’ve killed her anytime, so there was no reason to wait until she was out and people saw her leave with him to do it. No, it seemed too calculated for Damon. He couldn’t be sure he wasn’t going to hurt her, but he wasn’t going to kill her. Probably.</p><p>Stefan had to do something, but if he got up now, and tried to stop him, he’d never win. His best hope was damage control and trying to convince Damon to do the right thing.</p><p>“I take it you two don’t get a long.” Elena said, tilting her head to consider him.</p><p>“No,” Stefan said darkly. “We really don’t.”</p><p>“Maybe we should stop them.” Elena said, starting to get up, but Stefan stopped her with a hand on her elbow.</p><p>“No.” Stefan said. “If you want me to go and ask her to stop, I will, but I’d rather you didn’t. He’s only really a problem when he’s upset.”</p><p>“Madelyn can be very irritating.” Caroline said, and Elena shot her a glare.</p><p>“I know you don’t like her, Caroline, but she’s still my sister.”</p><p>“What? I know that! I’m just saying, if that’s what the standard is, she’s probably going to push his buttons.”</p><p>Bonnie took another fry from the basket in the middle of the table. “Just call her in an hour and make sure she’s still alive. If not, you can go home and check on her.”</p><p>“That’s not really something I want to walk in on.” Elena grumbled, taking a fry as well, and Caroline sighed.</p><p>“At least he was cute. If you’re going to be murdered, it might as well be by a hot guy.”</p><p>“Caroline!” Elena threw the fry that she’d been eating at Caroline, who put up her hands in defense.</p><p>“Well he was!”</p><p>Bonnie was still dragging her fry through some ketchup, more making patterns that preparing it to be eaten.</p><p>“Bonnie, are you alright?” Elena asked, shifting the focus back to their friend group, rather than Maddie’s escapades.</p><p>“I’m fine. I’m just… I have a lot going on right now. Grams is fighting my dad about that stuff I told you about, and they’re both sort of hard to be around.” Caroline reached out to rub her friend’s shoulder, Madelyn forgotten, and Elena nodded sympathetically.</p><p>“Grams-Dad drama totally takes precedents over Maddie being a major slut. What’s happening?” Caroline asked, and again, Elena glared at her, but she kept her mouth shut to keep them focused on Bonnie’s problem.</p><p>“Let’s talk about it later.” Bonnie smiled, but it was tight and hesitant. “I mean, Stefan doesn’t want all our drama. He just got here and he already got an earful about Madelyn. Let him get used to town before we let him in on all the dirty secrets.” She extended her smile specifically to Stefan then, and he smiled back.</p><p>“Family drama is no stranger to me. If you want to talk about it, I can go.” He threw a thumb over his shoulder in the direction of the door.</p><p>“No.” Bonnie shook her head and took a sip of her drink. “Let’s talk about something else. How long have you been in town, Stefan?”</p><p>Stefan smiled and slipped back into the role of social high school teenager. The fear of Damon and what he might do to Madelyn never left his mind, but for a moment, he could let it go.</p>
<hr/><p>Why Do I Trust You? (It's So Unusual For Me)</p>
<hr/><p>The evening air is still warm, though it won’t be for long. As the fall progressed the sun was setting earlier, and where a week ago it felt like the day went on forever, now the nights fell with a suddenness that felt almost pressing.</p><p>“My car is out back.” You tell him, holding up your keys. “I can meet you wherever?” It was always better and safer to take your own car with you to a hook up. Better not to be at the mercy of the other guy.</p><p>“Let’s take my car. I think you’d like to take a joyride with me.” He flashed you that devil-may-care smile and those gorgeous blue eyes honed in on yours and you felt suddenly like he may be right. Despite your previous misgivings, maybe this one time it would be okay.</p><p>“I would like that. I always get stuck driving.”</p><p>“See? Come on,” He wrapped an arm around your waist and led you a block down the street to where a blue classic convertible was parallel parked. The pain job shone in the last light of the setting sun, the blue barely distinguishable in the orange light.</p><p>A cool breeze picked up your hair as the evening chill set in and made you shiver in your lacy tank top and bared shoulders.</p><p>“Cold?” Damon asked, and you shook your head.</p><p>“No, it’s just the breeze, I’ll be fine.” But even as you said it, another breeze picked up and the goosebumps on your arms gave away your little white lie.</p><p>“Here,” He removed his arm from your waist and took off his jacket, handing it to you.</p><p>“Won’t you get cold?” You asked, reaching for the jacket, but not quite taking it. You weren’t certain about accepting his offer.</p><p>“Maybe, but if I get cold, I’m a little annoyed, if you get cold, you might get sick, and that doesn’t really work for me.”</p><p>You tilted your head and assessed him. It was a strange way to put it, your comfort in terms of himself. It was a red flag to you, but the thought never came full circle and made you head back to the grill, like it might have any other day in combination with everything else. “Weird, but okay. Thanks.”</p><p><span>You’re a very lucky woman.</span> The little voice in the back of your head said as you took the jacket from his outstretched hands. Against your skin the jacket smelt like the woods and expensive cologne, musk, mind, and something metallic that was almost off-putting, but not quite.</p><p>You turn your attention back to the car as he unlocks the door.</p><p>“She’s nice.”</p><p>He grins at you, his eyes crumpling up in a way that felt just a little bit too real.</p><p>“She’s my pride and joy. If you hurt her, I’ll eat you. Not in the fun way.” His grin is predatory, and it makes your heart pound in your chest, but he puts his bright white teeth away and looks you in the eyes again, the bright blue catching you in their gravitational pull. “But you aren’t worried about me hurting you. You know I wouldn’t.”</p><p>“Of course you wouldn’t.” You confirmed, sure that he meant you no harm. It was strange because you’d never hooked up with someone and been certain they weren’t going to hurt you, only certain that if they tried to, you were trained to handle it. You didn’t think you’d need that training with Damon.</p><p>“Good. My lady,” He opens the door and sweeps his hand in. You laugh at the silly display but get into his car without even asking where he’s taking you. It’s unusual for you, but all of your instincts are being overridden by a certain, unshakable trust. You’re a very lucky woman. You aren’t worried about him hurting you. He wouldn’t hurt you.</p><p>“Thank you, kind sir.” You laugh and play along, not sparing a thought for the misogynistic implications that you would usually consider and weigh against the rest of his character. He wouldn’t hurt you. You just knew it.</p><p>When he got in and drove, he was reckless. You should have been worried because your parents had died in a car crash four months before, and he was definitely getting near 100 miles an hour, but he wouldn’t hurt you. You didn’t ask him to slow down, or demand he let you out of the car. Vicki thought you were safe, but Elena would probably worry. You didn’t text her and tell her where you were going before you got in the car. You didn’t text her and then to tell her you were okay either. Maybe a part of you hoped she’d call and be worried, but you weren’t worried that Damon would hurt you.</p><p>He spoke without being spoken to, interrupting a spiral of thoughts, “We live a bit out of the way, but it’s a nice house. Spacious, kind of old, lots of rooms. I’ve got a great bed though.” He winks at you, and you smirk back.</p><p>“I think I’ll be the judge of that. You can never trust someone else’s judgment.”</p><p>“Be my guest.” He his warm hand reached over and clasped your leg, shaking it gently, but squeezing harder than you were comfortable with. That was another move that usually would have given you pause, but you weren’t worried about him hurting you.</p><p>His hand tugged your leg a little closer to him, and you moved closer to him without thinking, the heat of his hands radiating through your jeans. You lean into the possessive touch, pressing your body against his as he pulled into his drive way. He was warm, but you felt like he shouldn’t be. His hand slid further up your thigh, more suggestive with every inch gained, and it didn’t necessarily bother you, but usually that kind of behavior sounded the alarm bells. He isn’t going to hurt you. You believe it with your whole heart. Nothing inside you doubts it.</p><p>You still don’t text Elena to tell her that you’re safe.</p><p>He wrapped his bare arm around your shoulders, the only barrier between the two of you the jacket that he’d given. It’s strangely intimate, but you realize quickly that he has an ulterior motive to wanting you so close. His free hand gropes you, and you don’t mind, because you know he’s not going to hurt you. Warm fingers trail down and then trace back up under your shirt, light against your skin and making you shiver. It feels good to let him touch you. Warning bells and anxiety that would usually make this sort of aggressive behavior uncomfortable were absent. Instead you arched into his touch, letting his feather light touch light you up from the inside. <span>He wouldn’t hurt you.</span></p><p>There’s more to pain than physical discomfort.</p><p>You won’t realize how much more for a long long time.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I've got the next chapter finished, and I'm working on chapter 5. Expect much more canon divergence, and I might kill Katherine off before she gets on scene... just because. I'm enjoying writing this story and playing in TVD sandbox. Let me know what you think!<br/>Check out my <a href="my-vampires-keeper.tumblr.com"> tumblr </a> for early access to scenes and other TVD content.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Give Me A Ride Home?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The Aftermath of Sleeping with Damon Salvatore.<br/>It doesn't feel bad, but you feel like it should.<br/>Elena doesn't approve. Vicki does. Your Myster No Show Date is dead.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I had a really good time editing the first section of this chapter. It's really fun, strangely, to write these kind of coercive sexy scenes. I'm enjoying exploring this more manipulative, blending Damon.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <hr/><p>Give Me a Ride Home?</p>
<hr/><p>You woke up in a bed that you could tell was too big because your foot wasn’t hanging off the side. You could also tell it was too big because it fit another person. You heard the other person stir behind you and the press of a very male chest to your bare back was the only warning you had before a mouth descended on your neck.</p><p>“Good morning.” He whispered, and you turned around, looking in bright blue eyes.</p><p><em>He won’t hurt me</em> . Your brain whispered it like a promise, and you smiled, kind of amused.</p><p>“Morning. Didn’t really take you for the sleep over type. Why didn’t you wake me?”</p><p>“I didn’t want to have to explain to my brother. Speaking of, he just left, wanna get up?”</p><p>You squinted at him, confused at the mention of his brother. If he wanted you to leave, he could’ve just asked. You shook your head and then fumbled around for your phone. It was too late for you to get home and change, and you had a dozen missed calls and messages from Elena, Vicki, and even Jeremy. You rolled your eyes, set down your phone and rubbed the sleep out of your eyes.</p><p>“Yeah, give me a second. I’m dead till coffee.” You sat up and stretched, letting the sheet fall around your waist before looking around for your clothes.</p><p>He was still laying down, watching you, when you found your bra somewhere in the sheets and your tank top on the floor. Your pants and underwear, you remembered, are at the foot of the bed, where he’d pulled them off before putting his face between your legs and bringing you to a sweeping orgasm.</p><p>As you started to wake up, you remembered that you’d left your car at the grill and Elena would probably be at school already. You threw a pillow at him to jostle him. “I think I need a ride. Put some clothes on.”</p><p>He shrugged, putting his hands behind his neck.</p><p>“I’m fine right here for now.” He looked you up and down, removing the sheet still slung over your lap with his eyes, glancing behind you to your bare ass. You rolled your eyes, but didn’t try to hide yourself as you crawled across the bed to lean over the edge and grab your clothes. You saw your shoes there as well, and you realized that you couldn’t remember them being removed.</p><p>“Now I really like the view.” He said and you felt his hand clasp your ankle, drag it back and pull you off balance. You fell onto your stomach, the breath being knocked out of you and you laughed, rather than panicked, as he pulled you toward him.</p><p>You turned onto your back and let him climb over you, holding his hands on either side of your head and hovering over you. You have a strange sense that he’s not as warm tonight as he was last night, but you’re distracted by him stroking his hand over your face, tracing your lips with his fingers.</p><p>“Well, hello again Mr. Salvatore.” You said with a cheeky grin and he smirked back at you, blue eyes sparkling.</p><p>“Ms. Gilbert. It’s just lovely to see you this morning.” His voice is overly sweet as he pushes a stray hair off your forehead. His voice is so corny it makes you laugh, but it’s almost sweet.</p><p>“You’re ridiculous. Let me up. I need to get dressed.”</p><p>“Mmmm, I think maybe… you shouldn’t.” He leaned down and pressed his lips to yours. You smiled despite yourself and kissed him back.</p><p>“I’ve got class,” You told him when he pulled back, but the excuse was half hearted at best. He pressed his body down against your hard planes meeting softness and feeling strangely safe.</p><p><em>He would never hurt me</em>.</p><p>“You could skip.” Warm lips pressed down your jaw to your neck and you tilted your head back to give him better access, a sharp inhale when he sucked at a tender spot from the night before.</p><p>Your throat vibrated with a hum of content beneath his kisses. Your hands dug into his thick black hair and you guided him down your chest, then lower.</p><p>“Make yourself useful and I’ll return the favor.” You promised him with a soft smile and he kissed your stomach, looking up at your through dark lashes with captivating blue eyes.</p><p>“I like a woman who knows what she wants.” He trailed kisses farther down, to the apex of your thighs, cupping your hips in his hands.</p><p>“And I’m willing to bargain to get it.” You bit your lip, hiking your leg up to give him better access, arching your back and tugging his hair to guide him where you wanted.</p><p>He was about to kiss you right there when the front door slammed and made you jump, but Damon held you in place to keep you from hitting him in the face with your pelvic bone.</p><p>“Damon!”</p><p>Damon laid his forehead against your stomach. “Busted. Get dressed, Stefan is about to burst in.”</p><p>“Stefan? As in Stefan Salvatore?” You asked, pouting when he pulled away and left you wanting.</p><p>“Yeah, didn’t make the connection before?” His grin is not as playful now, a streak of annoyance tainting it.</p><p>You dragged on your tank top, not bothering with the bra because of short time, and used the sheet to cover yourself while you fished on the ground for your underwear and jeans.</p><p>“Damon!” A fist banged on Damon’s bedroom door aggressively, and now that he was closer you could remember the voice on the other side of the door from yesterday’s locker incident. Great.</p><p>“How did you know it was your brother?” You asked, while wondering yourself how you hadn’t known that Damon Salvatore was related to Stefan Salvatore. What were you thinking, coming home with Stefan Salvatore’s brother? What a stupid, stupid thing to do. Christ, Elena was never going to let you hear the end of it. If it got out you’d have to endure it for the rest of the year.</p><p>“Lucky guess. I’m a bit occupied!” Damon yelled when Stefan continued to bang on the door.</p><p>“Damon, what the hell are you doing?”</p><p>“I’d think that’d be obvious.” You called out as you pulled your pants on and padded over to the door. You weren’t going to hide in this mans bedroom. You were going to take ownership of what had happened and refused to be shamed for it. Fuck Stefan Slavatore.</p><p>“No, no, no, don’t.” Damon started, but you scoffed and opened the door.</p><p>“He spent the night with me. Problem?”</p><p>Stefan stared at you, mouth hanging open and eyes wide. You raised an eyebrow at him as Damon comes up behind you and put his arm on either side of the door frame.</p><p>“Yeah, brother. Problem?”</p><p>Stefan glanced between you and Damon and back at you. He looked desperate, maybe even scared. You tilt your head and consider him.</p><p>“In case it still isn’t obvious, I’m not Elena.” You told him before pushing Damon back with your whole body and closing the door in Stefan’s face.</p><p>“That was brutal.” Damon said as he turned you in the circle of his arms. You smiled and stood up on your toes, wrapping your arms around his neck.</p><p>“I didn’t take you for the bashful type. What was all that ‘no, no, no’-ing?”</p><p>“I don’t like to kiss and tell. I’m not a show off like some people.” He touched your nose with his index finger and you scoffed.</p><p>“Gross. I’m going to put my bra on and then you’re going to drive me home.”</p><p>“Or…” he slipped his hands under your shirt and started to pull it up, “You could just take the rest of your clothes off and spend the day with me.”</p><p>You pursed your lips and shook your head. “Tempting, but I think the moment’s gone, and I actually have class. Besides, I’m pretty sure your brother’s going to tattle. He seems like the type.”</p><p>“You’re not wrong.” He took his hands away from your waist and threw you your bra from the bed. It wasn’t a sexy bra, that was for sure, but you hadn’t exactly gone to school the day before expecting to hook up. “Well, it was fun.”</p><p>“It was.” You confirmed as you slip your bra on without taking off your tank top. “I’m sure you’ll remember me fondly. But seriously, grab your keys, I’ve got places to be.” You took your phone off the night stand, but when you turned around he was right behind you. You didn’t even hear him come up, and it felt way too fast, but you ignored all the warning signs. <em>He isn’t going to hurt me</em>.</p><p>“Kiss for the road?”</p><p>You raised an eyebrow at him and took his keys from where they’d been forgotten on the nightstand the night before. “Gross. Come on.” You shoved keys at him. “Let’s go.”</p><p>You finally opened your unread texts while you were walking down the stairs, heading for the door whose position you could vaguely remember, despite your lust-filled haze from the night before. The deep wood tones and complex architecture of the house reek of old money and opulence. You wrinkled your nose at it, but then turned most of your attention back to your phone.</p><p> </p><p>Vicki: Text me later. I saw you leave with him, he was hot af.</p><p>Vicki: Are you spending the night? What a slut!</p><p>Vicki: You have to come to school today. I need to hear about this hot mystery guy.</p><p>You: I’m getting him to drive me back to the grill now. Text you more later.</p><p> </p><p>Then you opened Elena’s texts, and it was a good thing you did.</p><p> </p><p>Elena: Hey, where are you? The car’s at the grill, but I can’t find you.</p><p>Elena: Vicki said you left with a guy. Text me to let me know everything is okay.</p><p>Elena: Madelyn, I’m serious, text me to check in. I’m worried.</p><p>Missed call from Elena. Missed call from Elena. Missed call from Elena.</p><p> </p><p>What had you been doing last night? You hadn’t even heard the phone ring.</p><p>Ignore it. Rang in your ears in Damon’s throaty sex laden voice, immediately followed by, <em>He won’t ever hurt me</em>.</p><p>You batted away the thought and called Elena on your way out the door to Damon’s car.</p><p>“Where are you? I’m worried sick!”</p><p>“I spent the night with a guy, which Vicki told you, so stop acting surprised. I’m fine, alive and unmurdered. Call off the search party.” You resist the urge to mock her overzealous fear by calling her “mom.” You made that mistake once, and only once. You still felt about about it sometimes.</p><p>“I’ll call Sheriff Forbes and let her know that you’re okay. You can’t scare me like that, Maddie. Do you want me to come pick you up? I had Jenna bring me the spare key so I could take the car home.”</p><p>“No, I’ll get a ride.” You looked over your shoulder and Damon was finally coming down the stairs in his leather jacket from the night before and a new tee shirt. “I’ll talk to you in a minute. I love you.”</p><p>“Madelyn, don’t hang up-”</p><p>You hung up the phone and smiled at Damon as he caught up with you.</p><p>“Thanks for the ride.” You told him as you followed him to his car, watching his hand as he flipped his keys casually, over and over and over his index finger.</p><p>“It’s the least I can do after everything you did for me last night.” He winked and you raised an unaffected eyebrow at him.</p><p>“Considering you insisted on driving me, yes, it is the least you could do.” You wrapped your arms around yourself in the morning chill, your tank top and jeans not quite cutting it against the early morning air. You remembered him offering you his jacket last night. He made no such offer this morning.</p><p>“My sister took the car home, so if you could just drop me by my place? It’s closer anyway.”</p><p>“Sure thing. Can’t have you going to school in yesterday’s clothes and sex hair.” He ran his hand through your loose hair, still ruffled from sleep and sex, and you pushed it away with a soft laugh.</p><p>“Yeah, that wouldn’t be great.” You opened the door for yourself this time, and another flash of the night before hits you. Then <em>He would never hurt me</em>. You didn’t even have a ponytail holder, having left it in the car when you’d fixed yourself up for your no-show date, and the loose locks tickled and annoyed your neck and bared back. They brushed against something sensitive, but you ignored it.</p><p>The car ride was quiet, but not particularly awkward. You updated Vicki, telling her that you were in the guy’s car and on your way home to dress for school.</p><p> </p><p>Vicki: Did you have a morning quickie?”</p><p>You: 1) None of your business</p><p>You: 2) No, his brother interrupted us :(</p><p>Vicki: That sucks :( But you would’ve?</p><p>You: Hell yes.</p><p> </p><p>“Who are you texting?” Damon asked, and you responded without even thinking about it.</p><p>“My best friend, Vicki. She wants to know where I was last night.”</p><p>“What are you telling her?”</p><p>“Wouldn’t you like to know,” You smirked, angling your phone just slightly away from him.</p><p>He smirked back and reached for your phone. “Singing my praises, I assume.”</p><p>“Oh Vicki, you wouldn’t believe how bored I was. I think I fell asleep. I thought the pretty ones were supposed to be good in bed.” You pretended to sob as you held your phone out of his reach and he laughed, almost driving into a ditch trying to grab your phone. His motion was a blur when he grabbed your phone, and you were surprised. Usually your reaction time was fast, but you hadn’t even had a chance to process the speed of him grabbing your phone before it was in his hand and he was reading your text messages.</p><p>“Did you have a morning quickie?” Damon repeats in a fallseto, and you laughed uncomfortably, trying to grab the phone back without obstructing his driving. Your face was burning, and you wanted to smack him, but you held yourself back because you weren’t feeling playful, you were feeling a little bit violated.</p><p><em>He would never hurt me</em>. “’1, None of your business.’ Aww, that probably hurt her feelings.” He pouted, still driving without his eyes on the road for long stretches of time. “’2, no, his brother interrupted us’ Frowny face. Aww, poor thing,” He kissed your cheek as you reached for your phone, an awful mocking sort of thing.</p><p><em>He would never hurt me</em>.</p><p>You finally grabbed your phone back from him, and you felt wrong for having to, but you ignored it.</p><p><em>He would never hurt me</em>.</p><p>This didn’t hurt. This didn’t feel bad.</p><p>“That’s enough of that. I’m going to tell her you’re an asshole.” You sit back in your seat and lock your phone so he can’t look at anything else.</p><p><em>He would never hurt me</em>.</p><p>“Yeah, but I’m good in bed, and that’s what really matters.” He winked and you rolled your eyes.</p><p>“I’m not stroking your ego.”</p><p>“Want to stroke something else?” He raised an eyebrow and looked down at his crotch.</p><p>Your mouth popped open and you looked at him with mock horror. Your hand fluttered to your chest hiding what little modesty you had.</p><p>“I’ll have you know, I’m far too respectable for road head.” Your body feels electric, the banter easy, despite the uneasiness in the back of your mind.</p><p><em>He would never hurt me</em>.</p><p>He pulled up in front of your house and you raised an eyebrow.</p><p>“How’d you know where I lived?” You asked, and he shrugged.</p><p>“Stefan. He’s kind of obsessed with your sister.”</p><p>You nodded, feeling suddenly protective and needing answers immediately. “What kind of obsessed?” The question is quick and tactless, but you can’t afford tact. Elena is your sister and as much as she annoyed you, you would do anything to protect her.</p><p>“Don’t worry. I won’t let him hurt her.” He stroked your face like he had in bed before, soft, tender, like a lover’s caress, and you looked at him wide eyed.</p><p>“Is that a possibility?” No one was going to hurt Elena, not even over your dead body.</p><p>Damon looked away and then back at you. He had a gravity in his eyes that made you even more worried.</p><p>“Stefan is a mixed bag. He wants to be good, he really does, but he has a checkered past.” He frowned and you swallowed hard.</p><p>“Should I be worried?”</p><p>“No, he’ll keep himself in line. If he doesn’t, I’ll take care of him.” There was a certainty in his voice, a promise that coupled with the pounding though <em>he would never hurt me</em> that makes you believe him. Elena was a part of you, Elena was your sister, if she was hurt, you would be hurt. Of course he’d never let anything hurt her.</p><p><em>He would never hurt me</em>.</p><p>You nodded. “Does this mean we’re going to be seeing more of each other?”</p><p>“That depends. Do you want to see more of each other?”</p><p>You looked around and even opened up the glove box to find what you were looking for. You grabbed his hand and wrote your number on the back of it with a nearly dried out pen from the floorboard of his car. “For a good time, call.” You said with a wink before getting out of the car and not looking back.</p><p>You weren’t even all the way up the steps when Elena opened the door and pulled you inside, slamming the door behind you while you could still hear his car peeling off.</p><p>“What the hell, Madelyn!?”</p><p>You sighed and shrugged your shoulders.</p><p>It was going to be a long day.</p>
<hr/><p>Do You Know Who He Is?</p>
<hr/><p>Elena glared at the dark haired main in a blue car over her sister’s shoulder. She was still wearing the same clothes she had been the day before, and her hair was even more of a mess than usual. There was no doubt what Madelyn meant when she said she “Spent the night” with a guy, but Elena didn’t need it shoved in her face either.</p><p>“What the hell, Madelyn?” Elena dragged Madelyn in quickly, glaring even harder when the man in the car had the audacity to wave at her before speeding off. She slammed the door to make it known that she wasn’t happy, and then glared at her sister.</p><p>“We were worried. Jenna almost didn’t go to class today.”</p><p>“You knew where I was, Elena. I’m fine. Can you relax?”</p><p> </p><p>“’Can you relax?’ Really? That’s all you have to say for yourself?” Watching Elena get mad at you was kind of like looking in a mirror, aside from the flipped perspective. It always made you a little bit uncomfortable, so you averted your eyes and went to the kitchen to pour yourself some coffee before you went to get dressed.</p><p>“I don’t have to explain myself to you, Elena. Even though you think you’re in charge of us all, you’re really not.” The warmth from your piping hot mug seeped into your cold fingers and you took a deep breath from the hot steam. Your sinuses opened up and the very smell of caffeine made you feel more alive.</p><p>“I’m just looking out for you! Stefan thinks he might be dangerous to you.”</p><p>“Funny,” You took an unbothered sip from your unsweetened coffee. “Damon said the same thing about Stefan. I wonder which of them was telling the truth.” You dumped some coffee creamer and sugar into the cup to make it more palatable.</p><p>This caught Elena off guard. “Damon said something about Stefan?”</p><p>“That’s what I said.” You looked up at her from your mug, “And neither of us have known them for very long, so what are the chances they’d both same the same thing about each other?”</p><p>“I don’t know.” Elena said. The furrow that formed between her brows was complimented by her pout. It was a look you hated to see on yourself, and hated even more to see on her. “I just… Stefan seems so kind, and Damon seems…”</p><p>“You don’t even know him, Elena. I don’t know Stefan. Sibling rivalry does crazy stuff to people. Maybe they’re both insane.” You shrugged your shoulders, and you felt a tug at your skin that you don’t quite recognize, but you ignored it. The tightness on your shoulder blade meant nothing. You forgot it.</p><p>Elena paced the kitchen while you drank your coffee. Her school bag and her the car keys were forgotten in favor of this new problem. “I know Stefan. He’s not a liar.”</p><p>“Well, I don’t know why Damon would lie about Stefan to me. Maybe to you, you like him, but I already don’t.” Not that Damon had any reason to know that you didn’t like Stefan, but still.</p><p>“What? Why don’t you like Stefan?”</p><p>“He walked right up to me and got us confused. I’m not fond.” You pulled a face and Elena looked at you, a flash of recognition in her eyes.</p><p>“Oh, yeah. He told me about that. You know it was an honest mistake, right? He didn’t mean anything by it.” Standard Elena, always coming to the rescue, heart so full of love for even a complete stranger.</p><p>“I’m sure he didn’t.” You said just to shut her up and downed the rest of your coffee in a few gulps. “I just don’t get a good vibe from him.”</p><p>Elena’s mouth popped open and you think how similar the expression is to Stefan’s that morning. A few moments passed as she collected herself, and you were on your way out of the kitchen, up the stairs when she finally caught her bearings.</p><p>“Well, did you know he’s like, seven years older than us?”</p><p>“Yeah, Elena, I did.” You looked over your shoulder while you lied straight to her face. You’d known he was older than you, but not by seven years. In fact, it should have sent up some alarm bells that someone old enough to be out of college was picking up a high school junior, but it didn’t.</p><p><em>He would never hurt me</em>.</p><p>He didn’t do it maliciously. It was an honest mistake. He probably didn’t realize how young you were. It didn’t really matter anyway, you’d probably never screw him again anyway.</p><p><em>He would never hurt me</em>.</p><p>“And you still went home with him.” Elena stressed, like there was a basic point there, and there was, but you couldn’t let Elena see that maybe that was a mistake.</p><p><em>He would never hurt me</em>.</p><p>“What can I say, he really knew what he was doing.” You dug your metaphorical heels in even as your physical heels continued up the steps. Caught in a web of your own lies and idiocy, you needed to escape. Even if Damon didn’t mean to hurt you, it put a different spin on what had happened last night. Something that felt dark.</p><p>“Madelyn!” She called after you, but you ignored her.</p><p>You slammed the door to your shared bathroom under the guise of brushing your teeth, and took a deep breath.</p><p>You were in deep shit.</p>
<hr/><p>I Hate Fighting With You</p>
<hr/><p>Downstairs, Elena turned up the news. You could hear the reports of people being murdered through the floor and you wondered if she did it to drown you out, or herself.</p><p>Your reflection in the mirror was sallow. Deep circles ring your eyes that feel unnatural, even for someone who had just spent most of the night having sex. You never really got the after sex glow that romance novels and television shows pretended existed. You always felt like shit after sex, but this was different, somehow. You felt drained.</p><p>You stripped off your tank tank top and your gaze pointedly avoided the mirror without you meaning it to. You turned your back to the mirror as your stripped, never sparing a glance for the bite mark on your shoulder blade, still raw and aching, tight as it tried to heal itself. When you stepped in the shower and it stung, you ignored it. When you hissed at the pain of soap entering a still irritated wound, you ignored it. You washed your hair and showered like any normal day, except you didn’t look in the mirror until you had a towel wrapped around your body, and one draped over your shoulders to keep your wet hair off your back.</p><p>The sting of the rough towel against the healing bite mark was worth noting, but you never did.</p><p>Elena was back in your room when you left the bathroom. Her foot bounced as she watched the bathroom door for you. You raised an eyebrow at her.</p><p>“Shouldn’t you be at school?”</p><p>“I’m not taking the car and leaving you stranded.”</p><p>You scrubbed at your wet hair with the right side of your towel, the left side still laying across your back, hiding it from view.</p><p>“That’s really nice and everything, Elena, but I’m not going to school today.”</p><p>“You missed half of yesterday. You can’t skip today too.”</p><p>“How are you going to stop me?” You turned your back to her, holding the second towel securely over your shoulder as you rifled through your dresser for clean clothes.</p><p>Elena huffed in frustration behind you, but you didn’t pay her any attention. You fished out a matching set of lacy underwear that Vicki had bought you half as a gag gift and half because she was determined to make a man stay with you. You almost never wore them, but you reached for them mindlessly. Why you would choose them after your one night stand didn’t make sense, but you weren’t thinking about it.</p><p>You grabbed a pair of jeans from the bottom drawer and another tank top. You didn’t grab your usual baggy sweater or soft worn oversized shirt to put on top. Instead you took the bare essential clothes into the bathroom, despite never having had reservations about changing in front of Elena before.</p><p>“I’m not leaving until you get in the car!” Elena yelled before you heard her footsteps storm down the steps. You wondered if she was making Jeremy late or if she’d had someone give him a ride.</p><p>Again you dressed with your back to the mirror, not bothering to take stock of yourself. The cheap lace underwear irritated your skin, but you didn’t change them. The black deep v-neck tank top fit tight against your skin, and made you just a little bit uncomfortable, but you ignored the feeling. Normally you did whatever you could to keep from being noticed.</p><p>Today you looked in the mirror, fully dressed, and you barely recognized yourself. You looked more like Elena than Madelyn. You didn’t look like Elena though. You looked like some strange amalgamation of you, Elena, and some unknown woman, a woman you’d never met and never wanted to.</p><p><em>He would never hurt me</em> flashed into your mind again, and you don’t really understand why, but it breaks the tension in your reflection’s gaze, and you are able to look away. You grabbed your phone from the pocket of your discarded jeans and saw you have more missed texts.</p><p> </p><p>Vicki: You’re late! Are we skipping? Tell me where we’re meeting.</p><p>Vicki: Okay, I guess you’re not in the back. I’ll light one up for you, just in case.</p><p>Vicki: That guy was so hot. Do you think he has a brother you could set me up with?</p><p> </p><p>You replied to this last text as you walked down the stairs, knowing the others are irrelevant at this point.</p><p> </p><p>You: Aren’t you with Tyler?</p><p>Vicki: We’re fighting.</p><p>You: Already?</p><p>Vicki: I shouldn’t have pushed it. It’ll be fine.</p><p>You: Don’t let him treat you like that. You deserve better.</p><p> </p><p>Vicki didn’t answer this text, but your attention was occupied by Elena now anyway.</p><p>“Is that the guy?” Her arms were crossed over her chest and one hip is cocked to the side. You ignore her terrible judgmental stare to get a granola bar from the cabinet.</p><p>“I thought you said we were going to school. Chop chop.”</p><p>“Is that the guy?” She repeated when you pocketed your phone to open up your breakfast.</p><p>“No, it’s not the guy. I didn’t really get his number before your boyfriend came in and cock-blocked us.”</p><p>“He walked in on you?!” The horror on Elena’s face is worth all the embarrassment of having just told her that.</p><p>“No. He just banged on the door like an asshole. Cock-block.”</p><p>Elena pursed her lips and grabbed the keys off the counter before you could. Which was annoying because Elena drove like a grandmother. You understood why she did it, but that didn’t make it less annoying.</p><p>“Who is it?” She asked when she just couldn’t hold her tongue any longer. Your backpack was still in the car, so you dragged it from the back seat while Elena started the engine.</p><p>“Vicki. She wanted to know what happened.”</p><p>“You know she’s messing with Jeremy, right?” Elena asked and you felt guilt creep up on you.</p><p>“Yeah, I know. I’m going to talk to her. She doesn’t meant anything by it. She’s just… that’s just Vicki.” You sighed and rub your temples.</p><p>“It doesn’t matter if she doesn’t mean anything by it, she’s stringing Jeremy along. She’s hurting him. Don’t you even care?”</p><p>“Of course I care, Elena. What kind of question is that! I’m just… she’s my best friend. I know you and your crew can do no wrong in the eyes of anyone, but Vicki… she’s got damage from way before Jeremy.”</p><p>Elena backed out of the driveway angrily, which shouldn’t have been possible, but every jerky motion of the vehicle writhed with Elena’s righteous fury.</p><p>“She’s hurting our brother. I don’t care what damage she has, that’s not okay.”</p><p>“It’s not on purpose. Elena, seriously, let me deal with it. You’re too aggressive about it and it just makes Jeremy shut down.”</p><p>“Maybe you’re not aggressive enough. Which one of us has been policing his drug abuse all summer?”</p><p>“You have.” You sigh. You had your reasons for not stopping Jeremy from doing drugs. One of those reasons was that it would make you a hypocrite. Elena was a hypocrite too, but she’d never found a lost cause she couldn’t rally behind.</p><p>“And which one of us has been making sure he gets home every night?”</p><p>“We both have, don’t pretend, Elena.” You glared at her, and she jerked to a stop at a red light. The guilt you’d felt was quickly being replaced by indigence. Elena was your sister, and you loved her, but this had always been a problem for the two of you, even before. “Just because you don’t hear about it when I bring Jeremy home, doesn’t mean I’m not doing it.”</p><p>“Yeah, I don’t hear about it, because you cover for him! Jenna and I have a right to know!”</p><p>“No, Elena, you don’t! All either of you do is make him feel like shit for having a bad coping mechanism! Newsflash, none of us have healthy coping mechanisms. You’re hiding and throwing yourself into a new relationship with a guy you just met, I’m sleeping with any guy who will have me, and Jeremy’s doing drugs. The only reason you’re pissed at me and Jeremy is because what we’re doing looks bad for you!”</p><p>“Shut up!” Elena slammed on the break in the middle of the road and you both jerked forward. “Shut up! Stop acting like I don’t care about you! I do! You’re all I have!”</p><p>“That’s the problem, Elena. We’re all you have. You can’t own people!”</p><p>“I don’t think I own you, I just want you to be safe! This Damon guy is bad for you, and Jeremy is dealing drugs at school!”</p><p>A car honked behind you and you both turned around and yelled different things at the same time.</p><p>Elena, “Go around!”</p><p>You, “Fuck off!”</p><p>You both glared at the car as it passed you and when Elena looked back at you the absurdity of the situation hit you.</p><p>You started laughing first, face in hand, a miserable, bent-over chuckle that shook your shoulders and pulled your tank top tight across your back.</p><p>Elena laughed too, but her laugh was tinged with sadness, maybe dramatic irony. The car was filled with uncomfortable laugher and when you looked at each other again, you smiled. Elena’s eyes were shining with the barest hint of tears. Your chest tightened and you slid over in your seat and wrapped your arms around her. Elena laid her head on your shoulder and you stroked her hair, letting her cry silently, her body shaking with suppressed sobs. You felt your own eyes prickle and hugged her tighter. You winced when Elena’s arms came around your back and the wound on your shoulder blade. Her tears hit your bared shoulder and ran down your skin, getting caught on the back of your tank top.</p><p>“I’m sorry I got upset.” Elena whispered into your shoulder and you nodded your head, trying to clear the clot in your throat and speak clearly. You had to be strong for the both of you.</p><p>“I’m sorry I didn’t call last night. I know it’s sketchy, but Damon… I just know he wouldn’t hurt me.” The truth of the sentence rang in your own mind, hollow in your chest but firmly held there. “I promise. I’m taking care of myself, and I’m looking out for Jeremy. You can’t tell him no, but we can try and keep him safe. Remind him of the consequences of his actions. But shaming him is only going to piss him off, and he’ll start doing it to spite you. Trust me, I know.” You laughed, remembering Mom’s fight with you over your use of weed.</p><p>“You’d know.” Elena repeated, but there was no malice in her voice.</p><p>“Yes. I would.” You bit your lip, peeling a bit of dried skin and letting the pain center you. “We’re going to get through this, Elena. I swear. Don’t take everything onto yourself.”</p><p>She nodded again and sniffles. Her eyes were red and swollen when she pulled away. She swallowed hard enough that you could hear it, watched her trying to swallow past the lump in her throat. She swiped at her eyes and you do the same, trying to hide the evidence of your own impending tears as much as possible.</p><p>“We’re late.” Elena said, putting the car back in gear.</p><p>“Just a bit.” You conceded, and the two of you went back to riding in silence as she drove you to the school.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
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  <a href="https://my-vampires-keeper.tumblr.com">Tumblr</a>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. The Date That Never Was</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Things start to fall apart. And people start to suspect that things aren't well with you.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I edited this a while ago, so if there are still mistakes, please lmk. ♥</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Despite every delay, you make it to school before your second class begins.</p><p>Vicki finds you in the hallway, of course, but instead of hounding you for details she looks somber.</p><p>“That guy that didn’t show up last night,” she said quietly, head tilted down, voice almost muffled by her hair falling over he shoulders, “He died. Animal attack.”</p><p>“Shit.” You whispered. “Shit. What happened?”</p><p>“I don’t know. They found his car pulled over, like maybe he’d swerved to keep from hitting something, and his body a few feet of way, all torn up.” Vicki gripped your arm. “It’s insane. I just talked to him yesterday, and now he’s dead.” Her gaze was far off, not really seeing, and you patted her hand where he held yours.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” You tell her, honestly sad for his death. “Didn’t that couple day of an animal attack a couple days ago too?”</p><p>“Yeah. I heard your sister’s friends talking first period. They’re thinking about a curfew until they catch whatever did it.”</p><p>“What do you have first period?”</p><p>“Physics, which is what you’re also supposed to have. Lucky you.” She rolled her eyes and you laughed. “I’ve been saving you a seat, maybe show up tomorrow?”</p><p>“Yeah, sure.” You tell her, bumping her shoulder. Neither of you had ever been good with processing the heavy stuff.</p><p>“So, Tyler and I are going to crash the back to school thing. You in?”</p><p>“You know I don’t do parties.”</p><p>“That’s why I said crash. We’re going to steal some beer and hang out in the woods. Tyler’s bringing a friend. You in?”</p><p>“I don’t know. My last date got violently murdered by an animal. Maybe we should hold of making schedules, keep history from repeating itself.”</p><p>Vicki bumped you as you showed up to English. “I’m just going to let you get away with that, even though I know what you’re doing. We’ll probably show up around 9.”</p><p>“I’ll be there whenever Elena gets there.” You tell her, and she shrugged.</p><p>“Hang out in your car, I’ll come find you. I’m bringing weed.”</p><p>“I’ll bring some cash.”</p><p>“Good deal. See you.” She smile and waved at you as she took off in the direction of her class at the moment the bell rang. You didn’t know what class she had, but knowing Vicki it was on the other side of the school.</p><p>From where you stood in the doorway, the teacher was standing and waiting for you to come in. English. Great.</p><hr/><p>Misery Class</p><hr/><p>“Madelyn, so nice of you to join us. May I start my lesson, now?”</p><p>“Nice to see you too, Ms. J. Don’t keep the class waiting on me. You’re in charge here.” You tell her in a dead tone, taking the only empty seat not next to Elena, but unfortunately close to Stefan Salvatore. And Elena was just on his other side. Ugh.</p><p>“If your sister managed to make it on time, Ms. Gilbert, I don’t understand why you couldn’t.”</p><p>You glance around Stefan in Elena’s direction, and she looked sheepishly back at you, not comfortable with being drawn in and used against you. You shrugged at her, and she mouthed, “Sorry.”</p><p>Turning back to your teacher, you shrug again, “Because my sister and I are independent people who move and live separate lives from one another?” You suggest to her indigence, and you swore you could see the smoke coming out of her ears. She glared at you and turned away from you, directing her attention to the rest of the class and introducing, oh joy, Shakespeare, on day two. Classy.</p><p>You’d had Ms. J for freshman year English and she’d been hell then too. You weren’t looking forward to this year.</p><p>You dropped your book bag and ran a hand through your hair, pulling it back to put it into a ponytail to get it off your face and shoulders. It was still wet, but it wasn’t so wet that it pulled anymore. Your fingers combed through it lazily, paying no mind to the bumps and lumps that formed so long as you got it up. The wound on your shoulder blade scraped, unforgiving, against your top. The tight skin made moving your arms irritating, almost uncomfortable, but you ignored it.</p><p>Beside you, Stefan Salvatore stiffened and you looked over at him, hands still in your hair. You raised an eyebrow and he looked away. Weird.</p><p>While Ms. J did her pre-lesson Shakespeare spiel, your thoughts drifted to the night before, the strange feeling you’d had on and off most of the night.</p><p><span>He would never hurt me,</span> your mind supplied anytime that you started to feel uncomfortable with what happened. You took a worksheet from Stefan without thinking and passed the rest of the stack to the next student over. The worksheet was quiz on whatever she’d just lectured on. You started filling in answers without thinking, drawing on what you remembered from last year, when you had also gone over Shakespeare, just a different play.</p><p>“Ms. Gilbert,” Ms. J said, and you looked up, just in case she was talking to you. She always did that, referred to you and Elena both as Ms. Gilbert while she called everyone by their first name. “Since you found my lecture so interesting, why don’t you share the answer to the third question with the class.”</p><p>“B.” You said easily, looking back down at your worksheet to continue it.</p><p>She frowned, not that you saw it, but you could sense it, before she chastised you, “That’s right. Please keep your attention on the class. This quiz is a grade.”</p><p>You don’t even look up at her. As they continued sharing out answers you checked yours against the correct answers when you could be bothered, and you got most of them right.</p><p>That’s what happened when your teachers went over the same material three years in a row.</p><p>When the bell rings you hand in your quiz and leave without a backwards glance at Elena. It’s not your</p><hr/><p>She Hates Me</p><hr/><p>Elena and Stefan left English class together, Stefan with his hands shoved his hands in his pockets, Elena clutching her textbook to her chest.</p><p>“That was rough,” He said, looking over at her.</p><p>“Yeah, Ms. J was our teacher for freshman English. She hasn’t changed much.” She sighed and shook her head. “That class is going to be hell. Maddie doesn’t take it well when people compare us. Which is a shame because she’s really good in English. I like to write, but Madelyn… she can dissect a piece of writing like it’s her job. It’s amazing. Sophomore English, the teacher was always getting caught off guard by her questions. It was great.” Elena smiled.</p><p>“Sounds like you guys are close.” Stefan said, but it was more a question than a statement.</p><p>“Not really.” She sighed again, arriving at their next class, history. “We used to be, but I don’t know. We just grew apart. I still love her, obviously, we’ve always been there for each other, but we just don’t run in the same circles anymore.”</p><p>“I’m sorry. It’s hard not to get to be close to your siblings.”</p><p>Elena nodded, “Did you and Damon used to be close?”</p><p>“Yeah. Kind of like you and Madelyn. We had enough of an age gap that he was kind of my role model. He was reckless, but he looked out for me, always tried to do right by me.” He sighed, “After our mom died, and then… things just weren’t the same anymore.”</p><p>“I’m sorry,” She repeated his own phrase back to him. “I know how losing a parent can kind of… make it all worse. We barely talked for weeks after Mom and Dad died.” Elena secretly thought that Madelyn blamed her for what happened, but she never said it out loud.</p><p>“I didn’t know you lost your parents.” Stefan said, and she shrugged.</p><p>“Yeah, a few months ago. Our Aunt moved in with us when they died. It’s been the four of us since.”</p><p>“How’d they die?” He asked, but then frowned, “I’m sorry, that’s insensitive.”</p><p>“No, it’s alright. It was a car crash on Wickery Bridge. I was there. They died in the creek. I didn’t.” It mellows her out as they walk into class, leaving her feeling sad and overwhelmed. “It’s been four months, but sometimes it still feels like it just happened.”</p><p>“That’s normal.” He assured her. “My mom died when I was ten and I still feel like that sometimes.”</p><p>They sat down, right next to each other, and Elena closed her eyes against the insults Mr. Tanner was already flinging at her classmates.</p><p>It was going to be a long day.</p><hr/><p>Keys Please</p><hr/><p>The final bell rang and you were glad for the school day to be over. The tension in your shoulders released, but there’s still a tightness to the raw skin at your shoulder blade. Never once had you tried to look at it, despite the regular discomfort it caused you.</p><p>Vicki met you in the hall after class. “Where are you headed?” She asked and you raised an eyebrow at her.</p><p>“Martial arts, like every Tuesday. You wanna come?”</p><p>“No, because not all of us are crazy paranoid.” She walked with you toward the car. “And besides, I’m a pacifist. I don’t believe in violence.”</p><p>You laughed, “That’s a bunch of shit.”</p><p>“No, I’m serious. I’m embracing non-violence. You should try it. Maybe you’d stop being so paranoid if you just relaxed a little.”</p><p>“Hmmm, no, I’m going to keep going. Will you make sure Matt gives Jeremy a ride home?”</p><p>“Of course. Love you, you crazy bitch.”</p><p>“Love you.” You give her a hug and then search out Elena for the keys to the car.</p><p>You find her with Stefan, and you don’t feel bad about interrupting them. “Hey, I’ve got class in half an hour, do you want a ride home before I go?”</p><p>“No, I’m good. I’m getting a ride with Bonnie.” She fished the keys out of her backpack and handed them over to you.</p><p>“Maddie, I just wanted to apologize again for yesterday,” Stefan started to say, but you shrugged.</p><p>“It’s Madelyn, and I already forgot.” You pocketed the car keys, “Thanks Elena. See you at home. Is it my night for dinner?”</p><p>“Jenna’s. You’re tomorrow.”</p><p>“Damn. Guess it’s take out. Get me something meatless. I’m not feeling like murder today.”</p><p>Elena rolled her eyes at you but nodded, “I always do, and Jenna only forgot the one time. Have fun. See you at home.”</p><p>“Will do,” You tell her with a half salute. “I asked Vicki to get Matt to give Jeremy a ride home. So, she’ll look out for him.”</p><p>Elena opened her mouth to say something about Vicki, but you walked away, not bothering to say goodbye to Stefan.</p><p> </p><hr/><p>On Tuesdays We Do Martial Arts</p><hr/><p>For once you remembered to leave your gi in the car after you washed it, so you didn’t have to run home to change. It was there and clean, ready for anything your Sensei might throw at you. Metaphorically or literally, as it happened.</p><p>You changed in the parking lot of the dojo, not really caring who, if anyone, saw you half-naked. Your gi fit loosely, as it was meant to, but it still slid against the wound on your back, the tank top doing little to stop the rubbing.</p><p>You walked barefoot into the dojo picking your way across gravel and grass, not bothering to put your shoes on just to take them off again.</p><p>“You’re early!” Your sensei called, and you smiled.</p><p>“I didn’t have to go home for my gi.”</p><p>“Start your warm ups. Pay attention to that shoulder, I can tell it’s hurting you.” She pointed to your left shoulder and you rolled it once, wincing at the tightness there.</p><p>“Yes, Sensei.” You bowed to her and went inside the dojo, kneeling to the altar before beginning your stretches in the corner.</p><p>You stretched in silence as you wait for your sensei to come in. She had a normal class, but you’d been taking private instruction from her for over two years, paid for very kindly by your parent’s estate now that your parents were dead.</p><p>“You’re distracted.” She said as she walked in, kneeling to the altar. “It shows in your movements. You’re wobbling.”</p><p>“Am not.” You said indignantly, and she threw a stick at you. You caught it in both hands and shouldered it.</p><p>“Respect. Ten reps.”</p><p>You went through the motions, felt your mind zone in on the movements, on maintaining fluidity and tension, snapping, flexing, holding. Your Sensei watched you, and you tried not to feel her eyes on you, feel the pressure to be good, to do well, overwhelming you and making it hard to stay focused.</p><p>You thought of Damon. <span>He would never hurt me. </span>Taking your phone, driving too fast, scratches down your back, <span>Don’t worry about them.</span></p><p>Your shoulder felt tighter, despite the stretching. When you finish your reps you bow to your Sensei and she is frowning.</p><p>“You’re sloppy.”</p><p>“I have a lot on my mind.”</p><p>“You have whatever you want, but you leave that behind at the door. This space is not for drama.”</p><p>“It’s not drama,” You said through gritted teeth and her her face stayed stone still.</p><p>“Five reps,” She held out her hand for the stick and you tossed it to her, going through the most recent kata that you’d learned from her. The movements, again, were sloppy, jerky where they should’ve been fluid, languid where they should have snapped. When she finished them, Sensei said, “Again.”</p><p>And, “Again.”</p><p>And, “Again.”</p><p>Eventually your anger at your imprecision overtook you, and you went too fast, overreached on a kick and fell flat on you ass as your momentum pulled your grounded leg out from under you. You huffed, screamed, bent in half and clasped her hands over her head trying to pull herself together.</p><p>“What’s this?” Sensei asked, tracing her fingers over your shoulder blade, making you wince.</p><p>“Nothing.” The response is automatic, you don’t even think about it. There’s a standing rule that any and all injuries are to be discussed before training begins. It’s a safety issue. Usually you even tell her if you’ve stubbed your toe, but the wound on your back that you’ve been ignoring all day didn’t even cross your mind. You could feel it, you were actively ignoring it, but as soon as the pain faded from your mind, you forgot about it entirely.</p><p>“You’re bleeding through your gi. This isn’t nothing. Are you wearing a shirt underneath?”</p><p>“Tank top.” You tell her as you sit up, and without warning she pulls your gi open and down past your shoulders.</p><p>“No, stop,” You say, batting her hands away, struggling to get to your feet on your injured ankle. “Don’t look at it. No one can see.”</p><p>“I thought you said it was nothing.” She said as she caught your wrists in her hand and used the other to pull the tank top aside.</p><p>“Shit.” She whispered, and you struggled, trying to get away from her, trying to pull your tank top over it, your gi up. No one was aloud to see. “Who did this?” She asked, and you kicked behind you, almost succeeding in knocking her off balance and making her release you and jump back.</p><p>“It’s nothing. There’s nothing there. Don’t worry about it.” You seethed, pulling your gi back into place.</p><p>“Nothing there, my ass. Madelyn, that is a giant fucking bite mark. Who did that to you!?” There’s an anger in her voice, a certain temper that she never had except when you had told her the reason for your interest in self-defense, nearly a year into working with her. To this day she was the only person you had ever told.</p><p>“Nobody! There’s nothing there!” Even as you said it, your heart pounded in the newly opened wound. Your blood ran hot in your veins and you had to go. You had to get away. No one was supposed to know.</p><p>“I’m leaving.” You told her, and she tried to stop you, but you danced out of her grasp, not even bothering to kneel to the altar before you left the space, picking your way across grass and gravel back to your car.</p><p>Sensei didn’t chase you. She was already getting her phone and dialing your most recent emergency contact.</p><p>You pulled out of the parking lot with a carelessness that was unlike you, especially in the months since the accident.</p><p>“Hello, Jenna, yes, this is Sensei Dena. Yes, I just saw Madelyn. She left our session early. I wanted to tell you about something I saw today during practice…”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Check out my <a href="my-vampires-keeper.tumblr.com">tumblr</a> for this universe, where I post all individual scenes of this fic.</p><p>Also check my in character <a href="covertvampire.tumblr.com">tumblr for interactions with this OC.</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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